Eloping/Eloped Bees: Officiant or Not? Describe Your Ceremony!

posted 2 weeks ago in Elopement
Post # 2
Member
812 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2021

We didn’t elope, but I’m excited to hear people’s elopement stories! I think little elopements out in nature are so sweet and romantic and I love hearing about them. Whether or not you choose to have an officient seems to be entirely a matter of personal preference. I think it would be really special for you to not have an officient, for your ceremony to be just you and your partner starting your marriage on your own terms and in your own way. But if you like the more traditional vibe, an officient could definitely give you a more structured ceremony.

Congrats on your upcoming wedding! 

Post # 4
Member
1042 posts
Bumble bee

I was/am a bit confused on why you want an officiant when you’ll already be married – it doesnt feel necessary for this and adds (imo) unnecessary strings. TBH if it were me, I would treat this more as a photoshoot and have fun with it! I love the idea of writing your own vows/promises and reading those out. Maybe bringing a small picnic with cake and champagne so you can toast to each other and also feed each other cake if thats something youre into. You can then have pictures of the vows, pictures of the picnic, adventure pictures hiking/near lakes or whatever is around there. 

Post # 5
Member
1679 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2021 - Glacier National Park-Montana

I agree with PP, take the moment to yourselves and have your photographer captures the magic!

We had an officiant but we weren’t legally married and had a handful of guests.  We didn’t want any guests (lol) but they insisted on crashing.  

So to get the solitary moment we wanted, we shared our vows with eachother privately in the woods the day before the wedding.  It was amazing and I highly recommend this. We got married in Glacier National Park!  

Post # 8
Member
1679 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2021 - Glacier National Park-Montana

View original reply
@castalia:  we had cake and champagne out there on the cliff.  If might be a little fussy but it can be done!  Maybe feed eachother cupcakes or something?   

Post # 10
Member
1679 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2021 - Glacier National Park-Montana

View original reply
@castalia:  it was professionally boxed and on a small stand.  We had paper plates and forks and flutes.  We just set it up on a rock.   Our photographer did the set up.  But she was kind of also acting as a planner. 

Post # 12
Member
73 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: September 2021

We eloped do the Isle of Skye last month. 
Ours was a legal humanist ceremony (humanist society of Scotland). 

It was so nice having a celebrant; not just because it made the whole thing legal, but because she constructed our love  story or ‘ceremony’  using questions she’d asked us separately. We then proceeded on to hand fasting, then I dos,  personal vows (written separately)  and then drinking from the quaich ( my dad’s) as husband and wife. We used whisky bottles in the during a tour of a distillery the previous day and fille it using a heirloom hip flask.  We had a random witness and one of our photographers was the other witness. In all it was a party of seven. 
It was remarkable- so intimate and very moving. Even if we were legally married we would have loved to have a ceremony like that in the setting we had. It’s great that we were able to incorporate traditional aspects in the ceremony. I highly recommend getting someone in who is able to construct a memorable, romantic ceremony. 

We had a lovely picnic in a place called fairy glen and had a couple of wonderful elopement photographers with us to capture the day.definitely worth investing in the best photographer you can afford.  We took a cake with us that was made by a local bakery. 

we ate at a Michelin star sea food restaurant as our wedding meal as we weren’t shelling out for catering!! 

Minimal stress, minimal worry and just a love filled day which was purely just about us and not the happiness of distant family members. 

Sorry for the slightly self indulgent post but our day fills me with utter joy. 

Post # 14
Member
225 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

We had an officiant when we eloped because they did the legal parts for us, it was all one ceremony. We met her in the parking lot, found a pretty spot on the beach, and did the ceremony. One of our witnesses also acted as photographer with my point and shoot camera. We toasted with a bottle of whiskey we’d bought at duty free on our way in to town that morning (with glasses the witnesses brought), and then went to a cafeteria style place for lunch (the only vegan restaurant in town open on a Sunday). It was perfectly low key and wonderful. The day will be special because of the spirit you bring to it, everything else is just set dressing.

 

ETA: our ceremony itself was the minimum needed to be legally married in that province. Plus we shared “vows” that we’d written about why we like each other.

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