- 6 years ago
- Wedding: February 2010
Warning: Long Vent. Don’t know who else to tell this all to.
I feel as if I have reached my breaking point. Neither my Darling Husband or myself have any support from our families right now and It has got me feeling so frustrated….like I am going to explode on one of them any moment. We are both very close to our families, and both families live less than ten miles away from us. We see them several times a week (his family almost every. single. day).
I found out I have endo right before I got pregnant, so my doctor referred me to a high risk specialist OB. It’s a good thing I started going to her because throughout this pregnancy I have developed severely high blood pressure and placenta previa. I am on two different medications for my high Bridal Party, but it is still very high and is affecting the baby.
For the past three weeks I have not been working due to doctor’s orders. She says working is the last thing I should be doing right now, as being on my feet a lot mixed with high Bridal Party can cause pre-term labor, which I have already gone into twice (very scary!!!) My Hubby and I both know that it is for the health of myself and our baby, so we have just learned to make it work and are just budgeting differently.
However, his mother won’t stop harrassing me about working. She never forgets to rub it in my face that “she worked til the day she popped” and “she worked hardest while she was pregnant.” Every time we go over there she asks me if I am working yet, and then proceeds to go on about how if I stop working now, I am never going to go back. She said that my doctor is overdiagnosing me and that she is SURE everything is fine. She just text me this morning and said “so, are you working yet?” I have a feeling she thinks I am taking advantage of her son, but in reality I am just trying to do what’s best for our baby.
I want to ask her what she would do if she was bleeding so bad she had to wear a pad, or if she went into preterm labor twice. Or if she had cramps so bad that she couldn’t walk or talk through them, or if she has passed out while pregnant due to overwhelmingly high blood pressure. This is my first pregnancy and obviously these things scare me and stress me out… I am not just going to work while I am bleeding and in pain just to prove to everyone that I can “tough it out.” That could affect our child.
My mom is no better. She is convinced that if I eat gluten-free that all my troubles will go away. She thinks a gluten-free diet fixes everything. She has given me business cards to three different OB’s becuase she thinks that my doctor is being too “clinical” and that if I changed my diet (aka cut out gluten) I would not need to be on Bridal Party medication at all. She means well, but just doesn’t realize that this woman I am seeing is a specialist who is known all over the state. She knows what she was doing. If she didn’t think I was high risk, she wouldn’t see me as a patient.
There is a whole lot more that could be added to this, but I will try to spare you all. I just feel that it is me and my husband against the rest of the world right now because our families can’t support us in the decisions we have made. I have decided not to work for the health of our baby, and that’s just not good enough for our family. Every time I talk to them they make me feel like a lazy piece of shit who just sits home all day and eats cheetos.
All I want is for them to ask me how I am feeling, or even just let me know they support me. I want them to stop harassing me about work, and just let us live our life. I know I am probably being sensitive and hormonal but I am just so discouraged and wish I had smoeone else on my side.