- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2013
This is my first post and I feel like an idiot. This is going to be a rambly post and I apologise. I just need to get some feelings off my chest.
First- a bit about me. I got engaged just 5 months ago after 7 years with my Fiance. We decided as we have been together so long we are going to have a short engagement so our wedding is in just a couple of weeks now! Eeek. We live in the UK at the minute- I am British and Fiance is American.
Ok now the rants and emotions. In the UK engagement rings are generally smaller than some of the stunners I’ve seen on here but they are starting to get a bit bigger (although I don’t think I know anyone with more than 1CT). Fiance proposed with a .4ct solitaire on a plain platinum band. In US sizes I have 4.5 fingers so it doesn’t look completely strange!
I feel like a terrible person but I have finally had to admit to myself that I am disappointed. I tried so hard to love the ring, but I can’t. As we are older (29 and 32) and been together so long I had dreamed for years of somehting a bit ‘more’.
It’s not even so much the size but the style. I knew he was going to propose but he wouldn’t let me go with him to choose the ring as he really wanted to do it himself. I had commented/hinted many times overthe years that I am not a plain band, solitaire person (I have said this outright and said which syles I like). I know a lot of people like them but it’s just not my style. But, this is what I got.
I have really tried to love it but I just feel upset. It doesn’t help that I have had awful comments about it!
My boss said ‘oh..that’s so tiny! I can barely see it!’ when she saw it!! I felt so upset and crushed after that I cried in the bathroom!
Other people have expressed surprise that I have this ring as it is clearly not my style (I like more unusual or vintage styles). Or people just say ‘awww, very dainty and small..like you’. Great, thanks!
I must say the diamond is lovely. It is excellent clarity, cut etc etc. I know that Fiance wanted to make sure I have the best quality diamond, rather than size as that is what he felt was important. As I said, it is the style not size that bothers me. But other peoples comments don’t help. People seem really concerned about the size and don’t seem to care about anything else.
I am started to feel increasingly upset about this. I know it cost him quite a bit (the valuation certificate is £2200 ( which is a bit more than $3000 or so. I know he paid a little bit less than the actual value by about £300) and it is too late to exchange it now. I hate to worry about what other people say but the comments are getting me down. That with the fact that I don’t like the style is making me sad! I then feel guilty as I know Fiance likes it. I thought about telling him after he bought it but he was proud of his choice but he has got my style sooooooo wrong!! 🙁
I am also wondering what his families reaction is going to be when they all come over for the wedding. They are lovely but very well off and from a part of the USA where E rings ar huge! I just can’t take any more negative reactions!!
I know there is no answer and I don’t really know what I hope to achieve by posting this- I just feel upset and like a terrible, selfish person so needed to share my feelings with someone! Thanks bees x