(Closed) Encore Support..

posted 9 years ago in Encore
Post # 3
Member
2634 posts
Sugar bee

So I guess you are referring to financial support?  I don’t think it’s uncommon for couples to foot the bill for their weddings these days, so In My Humble Opinion this doesn’t seem that unusual to me.  This is the second wedding for both my Fiance and I and we’re paying for it completely on our own (we both paid for our first weddings on our own as well). 

I’m sorry that you don’t feel that you are receiving the support you’d like, but maybe you can really take a hard look at your budget and see what you CAN afford and what is going to have to be cut.

Good luck.

Post # 4
Member
1514 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2009

I agree about most couples, especially encore couple footing the bill.  We’re getting married for the second time and minus a couple small contributions (like under $1000) from my parents, we’re footing the whole bill.  It’s tough, but you just need to sit down and decide what you can/can’t afford. 

Post # 5
Member
7053 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2010

First of all I’m sorry they’re acting this way.  I understand though how parents can sometimes view a second or subesquent wedding.  But yours is imho a different kind.  You were young, barely out of high school and about to become a mom and now?  You’ve lived, learned, and are a mom!  Kudos to you for being able to pull all of this off at 22~

You can never predict being a first time bride or an encore bride how the family will react and how they will provide.  When I was a first time bride, my family didn’t pay for that much, but my former H did.  He paid for about 80 percent of the entire wedding including the rehersal dinner.  My parents didn’t even buy my own wedding dress. I did.  And I paid for the bridesmaids’ luncheon, a good bit of the food at the wedding too. 

Hive hugs to you.  Just know you’re not alone.  There are many brides here who are having to go it alone financially on their wedding day too and you can count me in as one of them!  But I am older and more able to afford things though (just turned 40).  Never fear..the hive is here and you have some crafty bees here and we can help stretch a dime and give style advice here for free and DIY divas who can bring style tips and projects that cost a fraction of what a professional would charge!  

Post # 6
Member
179 posts
Blushing bee

My family is not giving me any financial or emo support either. I feel very sorry for Fiance because he wants a big wedding and we just cant have that without my extremely wealthy parents help. My parents think this wedding is a “joke” since I left my ex 10 years ago after 3 weeks and had it annulled. They aren’t even being nice. I don’t care about money but they roll their eyes whenever Fiance and I mention the wedding plans.

Post # 7
Member
774 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2010

I’m sorry for your frustration. When I first got engaged, I didn’t feel very supported either. As time moved on, slowly they (my parents) got more involved. Now, we are planning and my mom is much more involved and even seems excited, whereas before it really bummed me out that it didn’t even seem like she was happy for us. I felt like my parents had the notion of “You’ve been married before, whats the big deal?” When, in reality (albeit my reality) this is an even bigger deal than it was when I got married when I was younger. I have found a great guy and I GET it now. All that goes in to a marriage and just all of it. The first time around, I had a courthouse ceremony and my mom could not even be there. so, finally a couple of weekends ago my mom was telling me that my dad finally started asking questions about the wedding and logistics and she said that this is like my first wedding bc I did not have a wedding the first time. That made me happy, that she finally saw it like I did.

I hope they come around for you. (((((BIG HUGS))))) 

Post # 9
Member
5993 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2010

@KB… im sorry, im confused.  you married at 17 and youre now almost 22 but you have been with your current Fiance for 7yrs…. did i miss something

goodluck!

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