Ended Engagement – Now How Do I Move On?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
1284 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2022 - Maui

I ended an engagment after 6 months and a year of dating and i moved on by blocking him from everything STAT and removing all his friends/acquaintances/family from all social media. Then I got nice pink things for my home to reclaim it as mine and only mine and texted all my girlfriends to hang out. you did the right thing best of luck! It really didnt take long to get over once I felt that freedom from his lunacy.

Post # 4
Member
1578 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: City, State

I broke off an engagement and had the same feelings of freedom that you describe.  However, I didn’t “unfriend” him right away. 

A good friend reminded me that a real friend wouldn’t have treated me so badly for so long.  The right guy for you will also probably not appreciate this “friendship”. When he moves on, his next significant partner won’t like this “friendship”. 

You will eventually have to cut each other off, so why reinvest in something that was so broken?  Free yourself of his toxic influence on your happiness. Close this book, leave your memories in the past and start afresh.

Eventually, I disconnected from that ex. It was the best decision I could have made.

 

Post # 5
Member
310 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2029

View original reply
daisyroo :  He will never change the way he treats/treated you.  Break ups are ard especially since you fell so hard for him.  A man who loves you will make you a priority from the start w/out you even having to ask.  I was so hurt by my 1st love, but my FH is way different.  We have been together for a couple years and he still treats me he exact same.  There is a guy out there who will always treat you well.

Post # 7
Member
103 posts
Blushing bee

I just really wanted to say CONGRATS on unfriending him! It’s a lot harder than it sounds and I guarantee it’ll help your mental sanity SO much.

Keep doing as much as you can to distract yourself, it’s great you’re taking out some of the energy at the gym. Finding a new hobby is also always a good option. This is not quite the same, but I’ve had some health issues come up recently, and yoga has helped me a lot with feeling strong again and having something to work on every day whether it’s just silly handstands or stretching. 

Post # 8
Member
539 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2020 - Summer Camp!

I think significant religious/political differences can be hard to overcome. I wouldn’t be able to date someone seriously who is religious if they wanted to raise our children in their religion, for example, and it’s probably important for you to marry someone who values that. Remember that and date someone who is similar enough to you in the future. 

Post # 9
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: By the lake

View original reply
daisyroo :   Sorry that it didn’t work out for you, it’s probably for the better since you were not his priority.  That’s good that you unfriended him on Facebook.  There is no reason for you to stalk him-  to see what he is doing or where he is at or who is he with.  It may just hurt you even more.  Though you are still hurting, it wouldn’t hurt to start dating and hanging out with a potential mate.  I mean you don’t have to jump into a relationship, but at least it’s a step to see what is out there.  But only do it when you are ready.  Wishing you the best.

 

Post # 11
Member
1130 posts
Bumble bee

 

View original reply
daisyroo :  well at 28 I had dated one person ever, and ended it after a year. I find a journal recently I wrote that year that said “I don’t think anybody will ever love me or maybe I’ll never feel strongly about anyone’s again”

And at 36 I’ve been happily married for a year to a great guy I dated for five years. 

You are young, with plenty of time. Your relationship history is not unusual. Take care of yourself! Enjoy your friends! Enjoy your activities! Online date if you feel up to it!

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