(Closed) Engaged 2 months after my fiance's sister

posted 5 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

That’s a tough one… You said that you dont think your Future Sister-In-Law will oppose you getting married so close together, and that you’re mainly worried about family attending both. I think that you should talk to your Future Sister-In-Law then and see what she thinks. 

Post # 4
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

My Fiance has 2 younger sisters. We were engaged on May 13th, his middle sister on May 25th and his youngest on Thanksgiving. It’s all good…just start planning and things will fall into place. Don’t make it a race to the finish, just have fun and communicative with your Future Sister-In-Law.

Post # 5
Member
7739 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@amberla10:  A 2-3 month gap is fine. I admit I’ve never personally known siblings to marry this close – the closest I know is 5 months and that was no problem at all. But at either end of summer, 2-3 months apart, that should be plenty of time for everyone. You certainly don’t want to wait another year, but if possible I would move it back to May to give a little more gap.

EDIT: The gap is only for guests who have to travel. Close weddings should be fine for everyone else.

Post # 6
Member
2840 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I got married 5 months after my sister.  It worked out just fine.

Post # 7
Member
942 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Have you considered doing a destination wedding? That way you can plan it for winter/spring and it’ll still be warm and sunny 🙂 

Post # 8
Member
378 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I’m getting married 5 weeks before my brother.  And 3 weeks after my cousin, and 5 weeks after another cousin.  And 2 weeks before a coworker.  My sister is also engaged, and will get married next summer.  If I had to plan around everyone else, I’d never get married.  I’ve been dating my SO for 10 years, so I’ve waited enough.  

Post # 9
Member
330 posts
Helper bee

could you get married this summer?

Post # 10
Member
6743 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2014

Could you do it the same weekend so people don’t have to travel twice?

Post # 11
Member
1461 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@futuremrsk18:  +1

My aunt and uncle (siblings) got married the same week for this reason, it was great for us travleing guests.

Post # 12
Member
395 posts
Helper bee

Having your wedding in June shouldn’t be too close to their August wedding. I also like @tampalove35:‘s idea of doing a destination wedding.

Post # 13
Member
1375 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Plan your wedding for when works for you.  Of course you’ll have a good deal of overlap in the guest list, but people understand that family weddings are important, and will do their best to attend both.  I think having your wedding in June with their wedding in August is a great compromise.  My husband’s cousin was married 6 or 7 weeks before we were, and that was a good amount of time.  

Post # 14
Member
126 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

In this situation, communication is really important. Although you Future Sister-In-Law will probably not mind you having a date so close, I’m sure she would appreciate it if you spoke with her first before you made a decision. Also, it would probably be nice to have someone going through the same wedding planning stages. My friend is getting married in September 2013 and me in August 2013. It’s been nice to have someone to bounce non-stop wedding ideas off of! 

Post # 15
Member
2087 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think as long as your open and honest with your Future Sister-In-Law and let her know why you’d like to have your wedding then, she won’t care.  I’m sure she wouldn’t care either way, but it’s just a nice gesture, a courtesy to discuss it with her. 

Personally, I’ve been engaged about ten months now and my wedding is set for October of 2014.  My sister and her bf are not even engaged yet, but they’ve talked about getting married in the summer of 2014, so their wedding would only be 3 or so months before mine and I’m not jealous at all.. In fact I wish they’d hurry up and get engaged already so we could go to bridal shows together and book things together.

Maybe you could get discounts on things like the photographer if you both booked the same one, etc.  Obviously bigger things like the venue would need to be different.

Also one thing to point out to her would be that if you get married first in June, then those next two months the focus can be entirely on her wedding, whereas leading up to your june wedding, she’ll still be preoccupied with her own.  That’s part of why I don’t mind if my sis goes first – her wedding would be like a dry run for me, get a real inside look (i’ve never been in a wedding party) and then afterwards focus 100% on my own! 

 

Post # 16
Member
2087 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Oh and side note, we had two weddings this summer both on my fiance’s side.. one in June, the other on Labour day weekend.  So only 2.5 months apart.  Both were in the same town which meant both were a 6.5 hour drive for us.  We didn’t mind at all, we’re happy to see our family happy and getting married!  No biggie!

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