Post # 1
I’m new here. While I am not engaged yet, my FH and I have been discussing marriage and I know an engagement is coming soon. We’ve already determined a date we would like to get married. My question is this: his brother got engaged two months ago and have set their date for next August 2016. The date we want is June 2016. Is this rude of us to want to have our wedding 2 months before them when we will be engaged after them? Their engagement will be about 16 months long.. I just don’t want to wait that long. I’ve always wanted to get married in the spring or summer when I’m 27; I don’t want to wait until the following summer and have a really long engagement. I’m 26, FH is 25, and his brother and his fiancée are 23. Am I being selfish by wanting to have our wedding in the same summer as them? Or is this not that big of a deal? Will this reflect badly on me or my FH? I don’t want it to look like we are rushing to be “first.”
Post # 2
I think it really depends on where their family is located. Fiance and I are getting married 2 months after his sister. Their family doesn’t have to travel far. 3-4 hours tops. My family is coming from SC, Florida, and Alaska. My wedding is in Texas. So if one of my brothers decided to get married that close to mine it would be a problem since our family is so spread out (military) and it’s expensive to travel. So I think if the majority of the guests that will want to attend both weddings are in driving distance it should not be an issue.
I don’t think it will reflect badly, you shouldn’t put your plans on pause for someone else to finish theirs.
Anyways congratulations! 🙂 I am also getting married June 2016!
Post # 3
- Wedding: April 2015 - Family Farm
They get a day not two months. I really don’t see a big deal. THey might be annoyed but I wouldn’t care. 2 Months is pleanty of time between.
Post # 4
- Wedding: October 2019 - City, State
tm6173: you are allowed to have your wedding whenever you want. The only thing I would be aware of is how many guests are traveling and if they are going to be invited to both weddings. If lots of travel is involved for overlapping guests they may only go to your’s or theirs. Not both.
Post # 5
- Wedding: October 2015 - Drury Lane Oakbrook
It really doesn’t matter. Fiance and I got engaged in May 2014 and our wedding is October 2015. His step brother got engaged in July 2014 and their wedding was this ast weekend. We wanted a fall wedding and they wanted a summer wedding, so that’s what we both planned for,
Post # 6
I would say whatever you want you should do! People don’t get a wedding MONTH you get get a wedding DAY. 1 day. Now if you wanted to get married 2 days before them i think i would have to say no you’re just being annoying, but in this case you want to get married 2 months before them. No big deal. I dont see this as a problem at all. UNLESS, you have family that lives really far away. In which case it might be a little inconvenient for them to fly to you, then 2 months later fly out again for his brothers wedding. So you have to understand that some people might be a little miffed about that. Travel is expensive, there is airfare, lodging, and food to consider. Some brides will be annoyed (as i’ve seen on here) if someone has their wedding a month before them and they were engaged first blablabla. personally i wouldn’t care but you know the family best, so if you think it will really upset your FBILs fiance you can do 1 of two things. “Suck it up” and get married after them, OR (my choice) “Get married in June. She’ll get over it she gets 1 day.” I dont think it will look like you’re rushing to beat them to the alter. If June is a special month to you. Get married in June!!! Best of luck!
Post # 7
No. You get one. day. It doesn’t matter what anyone else does because they are not you two.
I honestly didn’t even know this worry was a “thing” before I got to the bee. I am getting married a month after my FI’s best man. We were the couple with the shortest engagement. I can’t imagine anyone being mad or jealous because we have been together the least amount of time, engaged the shortest, and marrying soon after.
It worked in our schedule to get married on the day we are so that’s what it is. I wasn’t even thinking of anyone else when I picked the date to marry my Fiance.
Post # 8
I would say that it may be difficult on the family to have two weddings so close. Me and my fiancé are getting married in November and have planned it for several years. My sister in law announced at the beginning of the year that they were getting married in May. We were happy for them but having the weddings so close did stress out some of our family members a little bit. But people will make it work somehow.
Post # 9
As others have said, it depends on the crowd. How many mutual guests etc? If a lot of mutual guests would need to travel long distances, I would consider rescheduling. If everybody is relatively local, I would go forward.
Post # 10
Thanks everyone!! I’ve alreay discussed this with his brother’s fiancée and she’s super excited and all for it. And their family all lives in the same state no farther than a 2 hour drive, so I think it should be doable. FH is worried it will make him look bad to propose after his brother did and then get married before. I’ve told him it’s normal and we shouldn’t feel tied to their timeline or like that have to “go first.” I don’t want him to feel awkward about this as I hardly think anyone would comment on the timing or care. Any suggestions on what I can say to ease his mind? I’ll be 27 next year and don’t want to wait any longer than that. We’ve been together 4.5 years and I feel it’s time. He does, too, but I can tell he’s wary of stepping on toes.