Engaged and not happy part 2

posted 4 months ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
420 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

jeez.. DO NOT MARRY HIM

 

leave…yesterday

Post # 3
Member
5208 posts
Bee Keeper

Seriously, Bee. This is not happy ending material. Give him back the ring and RUN. 

Post # 4
Member
729 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

This is one of those posts in the overwhelming majority of the sad, miserable posts on this website that I think you have answered your own question, OP, as your wrote the post. 

You never felt secure, you never felt safe, you’re always paranoid. You’re not happy to be engaged. 

Seriously? You need MORE reasons to leave this guy?

Post # 5
Member
856 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

LEAVE. HIM.

If your sister, or your best friend, came to you with this same story, what would you tell her to do? Wouldn’t you tell her she deserves to be treated so, so much better than this? Why don’t you think you deserve a guy who is faithful, who treats you well, who loves and respects you, who follows through on his words? 

Post # 6
Member
3997 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

lgarciab :  

The only issue with you that I see is that you are allowing him to treat you like a doormat.

How many times has he cheated now. Why in the WORLD do you want to marry him? It’s even affecting your work, you went to work crying because of the drama.

Please, PLEASE respect yourself more than this. I would honestly start therapy to answer the question you have, of WHY you want to be with someone who treats you less than dirt. Why you stay loyal to someone who cheats on you all the time.

And I’m sorry, but he did not look at you in pain when he was caught cheating. He shows you time after time after time after TIME that he doesn’t give a damn about you.

Please get some self respect and leave.

Post # 7
Member
463 posts
Helper bee

Sorry to be so rough…….but welcome to the rest of your life.

Post # 8
Member
54 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

You’re wondering why you’re not happy and if it’s you? You’re not happy because this is not a good relationship. Your boyfriend/fiancee cheats on you. Putting a ring on his finger will not stop him from cheating. The fact that he can’t keep it in his pants around other women means he is NOT devoted to you. And that in turn makes you feel insecure. Trust me, I’ve been there. I was married for 24 years to someone who wanted an open relationship and I agreed to keep the marriage going. I never cheated on him but he had several sexual relationships with others, and although I had agreed to it, it made me feel like crap. I loved him, we had children together, but I spent the whole marriage feeling like I wasn’t enough, I wasn’t good enough. It was a miserable existence. Do not set yourself up for a lifetime of this.

I eventually divorced and married my high school sweetheart, who is very devoted to me. Who tells me he loves me and that I’m beautiful and I’m the only one for him. And I know it, deep down. It feels good. I feel secure. I feel loved. I also feel a little dumb for hanging around with my first husband so long. I used to think “what if this is all there is…would i be happier by myself with no one to love or to stay married to someone who isn’t devoted to me?” Fortunately, I was able to get out for something better.

Don’t sign up for this. You deserve to be loved for who you are and to have someone who is truly devoted to you.

Post # 9
Member
3317 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

PART 2? are you dumb? LEAVE HIM.  

Just LEAVE him. 

No other advice for you.

Post # 10
Member
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2019

Leave him! Do not be a fool and let him continue to walk all over you. You deserve someone who will treat you with respect and that you can actually trust.

Post # 11
Member
6051 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

lgarciab :  Of course you’re not happy at all! This guy is scum! 

Kick this cheating loser to the curb NOW. 

ETA: Also, this is titled “Part 2” so I’m assuming there’s another, also horrible, Part 1 somewhere…?

Post # 12
Member
1053 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

He won’t go public on social media about your engagement because he plans to keep cheating on you. Dump him. Now. Right now. He sucks. 

Post # 13
Member
1263 posts
Bumble bee

You should never have to “fight for” a relationship. 

Do you really need anything more to convince you this guy is a douche?

Post # 14
Member
586 posts
Busy bee

He doesn’t care about you. You keep “ending up back together” despite breakups because you allow it. You allow him to keep treating you like shit, he gets no consequences for his behavior (being broken up and staying broken up). He didn’t cry because he thought he was gonna lose you, he cried because he was caught. Being married to this guy isn’t going to change him!

Post # 15
Member
446 posts
Helper bee

Oh bee 🙁 why would you even consider marrying this man let alone carry on in a relationship with him?? You need a new boyfriend. Plain and simple. This one won’t stop cheating. A ring on your finger nor his will stop him. And no marriage paper will stop him. You’re signing up for a lifetime of hurt and he’s likely to bring you home a disease or his mistresses baby in the future. He’s not the one. His actions don’t say that he loves you or that he’s proud to be with you. I’ve always dated pretty shitty men like him in the past but now I’m engaged to one who’s completely different. Someone that truly loves me. And I see the differences in the actions between those shitty men and the one that loves me. I don’t have to beg to be on his Facebook. He’s proud to have me, proud of us and puts me on there without having to ask. Who knew guys who loved you and aren’t trying to hide you do that? I’d bet he doesn’t want to put anything on Facebook because it’ll damper his cheating pool. Neither one of your are happy. deciding to spend the rest of your life with someone shouldn’t be surrounded with the unhappiness and fighting you’ve described. You just aren’t right for each other. I promise there’s better out there. Kick him to the curb. Send him back to the gym or one of those several girls he’s cheated on you with. You deserve better. But you won’t find it messing with this loser. 

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