(Closed) Engaged but no announced!!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
310 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I personally think that’s a little selfish. I would be upset if I got engaged and decided to throw myself a party and then someone else shows up to my party and announces their engagement. But that’s just me. I wouldn’t do it.

Post # 4
2815 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Yeah, I wouldn’t say anything at the party.  If you wear the ring, you can tell people if they notice, but don’t really make a big deal of it this weekend.

Post # 6
2494 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

@BoiledPNut: I agree with this too. I would be upset if someone announced they were engaged at my first party after getting engaged. I think it is different if someone notices the ring.

Post # 7
10 posts
  • Wedding: October 2011

Yeah, I’d wait for better timing as well.  And I wouldn’t wear the ring because somebody will notice it and it’s a sneaky way to make your announcement.  Let your friends have their party and enjoy their moment.  I understand how challenging this is for you because I had a similar experience of having to keep my engagement a secret for a little while for similar reasons.  I think the engaged couple’s feelings will be hurt and also a number of people will think you’re being tacky if you try to steal the limelight.  You don’t get to make such a happy, wonderful announcement very often in life, so save it for a time when everyone can be focused on you and your Fiance.  You can tell the people at your new job to get it off your chest.

Post # 8
653 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I’ve gone through this before. My husband asked me to marry him the 26th of may while on vaction and on the 6th of June the day after we got home was his brother and sister-in-law’s wedding shower (they had it guys and girls). Anyway, when we got home everyone knew about it and only a select few said congrats, which I was completely fine with because it was out of respect for the bride and groom to be. I actrually didn’t even  wear my ring to the shower, I didn’t want to draw attention to our engagment. Yes, people asked to see my ring and said congratulations but I did all I could to make sure all the attention was on the bride and groom. 

Seeing that no one knows I don’t think it would hurt to tell family (call, email, go visit) and wear your ring to the party, but I strongly suggest not making a big deal of it at the party. How would you feel it was the other way around? 

Maybe you can plan a nice little get together during the week next week to make the big announcment.

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