- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
It doesn’t feel official until I have a ring.
It doesn’t feel official until I have a ring.
he proposed in may, i didn’t have a ring until june. and the only reason i got a ring in june was because we used his grandmother’s stone.
just because you don’t have a ring doesn’t mean you’re not engaged. i know a few couples who were engaged AND married without rings. and i know a few couples who didn’t do rings until way after they were engaged already.
i also know a few girls who wear engagement rings that they bought for themselves, and aren’t even in relationships. they just wanted an engagement ring. which, is weird to me. but whatever floats your boat.
I refuse to believe that anybody is stupid enough to think that an engagement is some how invalid because the girl doesn’t have ring.
I was engaged for over two months before I had a ring. Of course it’s legit we set our wedding date and booked a venue beforgo my ring was finally completed.
By the way, I also had a friend (who actually turned out not to be much of a friend at all) say to me that I should have waited until I actually had a ring before I started planning my wedding, but this person was just jealous because she was wedding-obsessed herself and I got engaged before she did. Ultimately, she wasn’t able to be happy for me at all and was always SO negative about everything related to my wedding before I decided that enough was enough and just cut ties with her. Hopefully your friends are not like her, though. I would ask them why they are saying these things to you and tell them how much it bothers you. I would also tell them that it would mean a lot for them to support you and be happy for you during this time whether or not you have a ring.
I voted for it’s just as legitimate. I never understood the argument of “If you wear a ring it means you are taken”. So, does that mean de facto couples or married couples who are in a loving relationship but don’t wear a ring means that they are constantly on the prowl?
A ring is an option in a relationship. But the factors which make a relationship wonderful, such as love, commitment, respect, and trust are not optional and you can’t wear those on your finger.
We were engaged for like 7 or 8 months before I got a ring, I don’t think it made it any more legit to us but we did wait to tell most people until then because a lot of people do think it’s required. I like my ring because it’s really pretty, but it’s not what made our engagement and I’m much more sentimental about the actual proposal which came way before the ring.
This is my situation right now, and as much as it bothers me to admit…it’s tough for me to be engaged sans ring. We have been long distance (LD) for 3 years, he asked me 5 months ago and although I am certain the fact that we are getting married is legit, it is really hard without having a ring to accompany the sentiment. He has said January, but after showing him a picture of what I like, I don’t bring it up anymore.
I think it’s harder not to have one in an LD situation, people already don’t think my relationship is real, so now having an engagement without a ring seems to make people doubt that’s real too :(. It sucks.
We were engaged for 4 months before I got a ring (Heck I could wait 4 months after being together for 9 years lol). This was okay with both of us…it was legit for both of us…
I did however only announce it to very close family members.
A couple days ago, I got the ring, and now it is “Official” aka shouted it from the rooftops….but it has always been legit to us. :)…We just did not want to hear any negative comments, well fiance is the type to really care less what other people say…but I did not feel like dealing with negative comments lol…
Like I already had the venue, photographer, violinist booked before it was “official” lol….
I think that the ring is a necessary symbol to show the commitment. That said, it doesn’t have to be expensive. I feel that your partner should buy the ring they can afford instead of saving for years. I had a friend whose ring cost $7000 but it took her fiancé 3 years to save up for it. I just don’t get it. A $100 ring doesn’t make you feel more engaged or in love than a $1000 one.
I am married without an actual ring…we didn’t even have a “proposal.” We just decided to go to the recorder’s office one day in September and sign the papers. After the fact, I got a $.25 ring from one of those trinket machines in the grocery store. It doesn’t fit and I don’t wear it.
Do I want a real ring? Eh. At this point, I don’t even want to really have the wedding we were planning before…Why? Because I have everything I want. I am his wife and spending 20k on one day doesn’t seem to matter anymore. I feel the same way about a ring: having or not having one doesn’t make me any less or any more his wife.
I think in general a ring is a sign of his commitment. For most couples, definitely not all, I would question how commited he was to getting married if there was no ring. I’ve known too many women who say my fiance this, my fiance that, and there is no ring, no wedding planning, no anything. Then that relationship is over and they move over to the next one.
For couples that don’t want a ring, then I think planning a wedding is a sign of a real commitment.
While love and intent are awesome, people can’t see that. They can see a ring so for most people, I think they need to see a ring.
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