Post # 1
Fiance and I have been engaged since the end of January. I was on Weddingbee EVERY day, for hours at a time, so excited about wedding planning. Then… I saw all that was involved in wedding.
Honestly, I never realized how much goes into it! I thought you just buy a white dress for a couple hundred bucks, go to church, then eat food. I became so overwhelmed, I just stopped thinking about it. Didn’t go to any wedding-related site for months. Now I’m kind of freaking out. Seeing people planning a year and a half before their own weddings, and already have so many things done!
It’s not as much of a problem here as it would be in a big city or for a big wedding with hundreds of guests. Nothing really needs to be done so soon, except the dress (I have to order it this week, and I don’t have time to go to the bridal shop until Friday – so basically, I’ll have to try on and pick THE dress that day). Venues, photographers, florists, etc. are usually not booked until 4 months before the date.
But I wish I had done some planning before. Now I feel more overwhelmed than before because I have more to do in less time. And my Fiance is in a different state, so I’m going to have to handle everything myself… and I’m starting to feel like I just want to forget about the whole thing again. I need a swift kick in the butt!
Anyone else have this feeling? Advice to not feel so overwhelmed? Where to start? I’ve already made plans to go dress shopping this Friday, and meet with my venue next week.
Post # 3
- Wedding: July 2014 - saint patricks parish
ok you need a wedding obsessed friend and a wedding planner. I also use to think the same way until my first engagement then it was like wtf I’m so lost so I can help if you want. I’m very wedding obsessive and have nothing to do. and don’t worry I’m pretty sure other bees will also be here for your support too.
Post # 4
@Akbridezilla: Aw, thanks AKbridezilla! I just might take you up on that offer 🙂 I’m sure I will be on the Bee quite frequently asking everyone all sorts of questions during the coming months!
Post # 5
I don’t think you need to feel bad at all. It’s perfectly reasonable to feel stressed out by everything that goes into planning (I know I am). There’s no right or wrong way to plan a wedding, just as there is no right or wrong wedding. Weddings are as simple or as complex as you make them.
If you haven’t already done so, I think you should check out A Practical Wedding: Creative Ideas for Planning a Beautiful, Affordable, and Meaningful Celebration by Meg Keene. Some of the bloggers have mentioned it, and I, myself, read it when my friend gave it to me and my fiance as an engagement present. It makes a strong case for staying sane during wedding planning and not buying into all the craziness that the wedding industry tells you you must have. Just keep telling yourself that all that matters is that you’re getting married. Because that’s really all that matters.
Regardless of when you start planning, I’m sure your wedding will be fantastic. 🙂
Post # 6
Yess A Practical Wedding is awesome.
Check out some lists; I like the ones from Real Simple but there’s tons out there. Figure out what you need, and get started. Do what you can. Don’t do stuff you don’t care about. If you have friends willing to help, use their strengths.
Post # 7
@everyheart: I have a little longer to plan than you do, but I definitely understand how overwhelming this whole process can be!
I’m a lot like you in that I didn’t realize how much actually goes into the wedding planning process until I started checking out websites like WeddingBee. I love this site (it can be really helpful, and it’s completely addicting!), but sometimes I have to step away from it because I start feeling like I’ll never get everything done in time.
Hopefully you’ll feel a sense of support here (and get great responses to your questions). Just know that you’re not the only one that feels this way!
Post # 8
@gypsy1899: Yes! I love APW. I started reading their website long before I was engaged (and honestly, it was super helpful towards my relationship and made me think about a lot of different things), and as soon as that ring was on my finger, I ran out to buy the book. Best $12 I ever spent. That book can talk you down from any planning ledge and will make you reconsider pulling out your hair from stress!
Post # 9
@Akbridezilla: Agreed! Wedding obsessed friends are wonderful and so are coordinators!
Post # 10
Thanks for your responses! This is why I love Weddingbee.
Well, I know what book I’ll be putting on my Wish List… 🙂
Whatever happens, I will just focus on the fact that I am going to be married to the man I love. The most important part of it all is not the wedding, but what comes after~
Post # 11
Don’t Fret! A wedding is as complicated or as simple as YOU make it. The essence is that you show up, the groom shows up, and you have someone officially marry you. Everything else, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING, is frills.
So yes, you will see people on the bee fret about craft projects and uplighting and tablescapes. But that does not mean YOU need them. You need you, and a groom, and a wedding ceremony.
And if you do want to add a frill or two (or three, or five), this is the place to be (or is it bee?)! So many helpful answers for every level of budget, time investment, and energy. I’ve rarely seen a more supportive community.
Post # 12
I’d suggest creating a plan of action that is based on what your priorities are-venue, food, dress…and start with the big important stuff and let the little things come in time. You’ve still got plenty of time to get the planning done. I only got engaged in October and am planning a June wedding while in grad school, but it is possible by making decisions and sticking with them. Shorter timelines are about decisive movements towards marriage. If you haven’t done anything yet, I’d start with a venue and catering (or whatever food option you choose…including potluck!) then work on attire and invites. Decor can be decided on later in the process and somewhat depends on the other areas.
I’ll mention my adoration for APW. It just makes sense…and has already talked me off the “buy more wedding somethings” ledge once!
[email protected], you can make your wedding as fancy or casual as you want-the little stuff is just that…little.
Post # 13
I know exactly how you feel! Ive been engaged since June 2012, and my wedding is June 2013. The ONLY thing I have is the reception venue. There is so much that goes into wedding planning and it kinda makes me not want to do it. I wish someone would just do it for me and make it look great. But I cant afford a wedding planner so its all up to me.
Post # 14
@Sunnybrook: “A wedding is as complicated or as simple as YOU make it. The essence is that you show up, the groom shows up, and you have someone officially marry you. Everything else, AND I MEAN EVERYTHING, is frills” +1 on this! So true!!
OP take it one day at a time and you will make your day super special 😀
Post # 15
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
I made a month-to month checklist of what I had to do, limiting myself to 2 DIY projects in the last 3 months approaching the big day, and having everything done by 2 weeks before the wedding. I feel so much better when I “chunk” it out.
Post # 16
Get to doing/planning girl you have time, 6 months is enough time to plan a wedding.