Post # 1
Hi! My fiance and I are getting married next year. We plan on inviting 175 people – we have a lot more people we’d like to invite, but just can’t handle those kind of costs. In order to control numbers, we allowed each of our parents 20 friends they’s want to invite.
We are now receiving engagement presents from our parents’ friends – some who will not be invited to the wedding since we do not really know them. Is there any etiquette on accepting these gifts but not inviting them to the wedding? Although I feel bad, we just can’t afford to invite anymore people.
Any advice would be great, thanks!
Post # 3
@lambs379: I think its ok to accept them as long as you send a heartfelt thank you note.
Post # 4
oooh, I definitely think you should invite them if they got you an engagement present. But maybe check with your parents to see what they think.
Post # 5
@bluebelle23: I totally agree with you there!
Post # 6
If you invited them to an engagement party and they got you a gift, you really should invite them to the wedding. If they gave you a gift but weren’t invited to your engagement party (or if you didn’t have an engagement party), send a heartfelt thank you note for their generosity and don’t invite them to the wedding if you can’t afford it. Gifts shouldn’t come with strings attached, so assume that their gifts were sincere celebration of your engagement, not fishing for a wedding invite.
Post # 7
@bluebelle23: Sorry I disagree. We received lots of gifts from my parents friends and they are not invited.
OP, did you have an engagement party and that’s where you got the gifts? If so, then yes you need to invite them but if it was just an out of the blue present then just send a thank you note.
Post # 8
@VAwife: I agree.
You can’t control what people choose to do, but if you had an engagement party and these people were invited to that you need to invite to wedding as well. If they just took it upon themselves to gift you then that was their choice.
Post # 9
Thank you everyone for your feedback!
We did not have an engagement party, so these people gave us gifts on their own. Mind you my fiance and I have never even met some of them; they gave the gifts to my mom and my finace’s mom. I would agree that if the presents were given at an engagement party we invited them too, I would most defintiely invite them to the wedding.
I think I’m going to stick to writing heart-felt thank you notes to them for the gifts. Adding 6, 8, 10 extra people who are basically strangers to us is just not finacially resaonable for us right now. thank you again!