Post # 1
so my parents want to throw us an engagment party. this is never really something i had in mind/planned on doing. i dont want to say no, because i actually like the idea of the 2 familys getting together since our wedding wont be until 2013. but do we invite everyone that will be going to the wedding? it will be a small wedding a little under 100 people including all family and close friends. has anyone had one? can someone give me kinda a run through of what is to be expected at one?
Post # 3
I don’t imagine you have to invite everyone, unless of course you want to. I always thought it was just family (and not necessarily ALL family) and maybe bridal party, but we haven’t had one yet (though my mother keeps pushing for one this summer).
Post # 4
we had one and it was an open invitation to our immediate families and bridal parties. FH’s parents threw it, so they invited their extended family, all of whom live quite close. His parents asked if we wanted to invite our extended family, but we opted not to, as they live hundreds of miles away and may have felt guilty having to say “no” or travel in winter conditions, so we made the decision for them. I think we ended up with about 30 people.
Post # 5
We had one in which most of the guests invited were people not coming to the wedding. Of course there was a good reason for that…. Everyone at the engagement party would have had to fly 6k miles to come to our wedding! 🙂 I do think though that with your wedding so far in the future, you probably don’t really have a good handle on what the real guest list will end up being – ie some friendships might end, some might begin, some friends might get married or divorced, etc. In your situation, I’d gather together the people you most want to share your engagement news with!
Post # 6
we are only inviting lifelong friends, so friendships ending isnt really a problem for us, as the friends that are invited are in our wedding. as for the rest of the invite list, it is pretty much all family and family friends that might as well be considered family. our friends are also allowed to invite a guest to the wedding so again not a problem. we are over counting our guests already so we definately will not go over 100 people. we are both from small familys.
Post # 7
We just had our engagement party last month and had about 60 guests of the 200 wedding invites there. Immediate family, close family friends, close friends on my side and immediate family and close friends on his side. He is not as close with his aunts, uncles, etc so they were not invited. My sisters did call to mention to some of my friends that came that they were invited because I feel closer to them and to keep that in mind when around my 20 other girlfriends who were not invited.
I felt it was a great place for the families and bridal parties to meet for the first time. Save the big blow out for 2013!
Post # 8
We had one with just our immediate families and bridal party about a year before the wedding. We also requested that people not bring gifts and put at the bottom of the invitation – your presence is the best gift you can give. In my opinion, I wanted people to just come and have a good time and not worry about what to bring or get us. My BIL got married and we had to get them an engagement gift, a bridal shower gift, a Co-ed shower gift, bachelorette party gift, and wedding gift. It got a little exhausting and very expensive at the end of it. Oh and they divorced 2 years later.
Post # 9
we have decided to invite his family that he is closest to and my family will be coming. we will invite everyone in my family, but most likely then not only half of them or less will come.. thank you all for the advice
Post # 10
I had an engagement party and my parents also ended up have control over it. It was suppose to be all family and just our close friends. But my parents invited some of their close friends who really wnated to come because they have known me forever. It seems like when it comes to marriage everyone wants an invite. You just have to do what’s right for you.