Post # 1
do you give presents at an engagement party?
The bride is getting married May 16, 2014. She is having an engagment party November 4, 2013, a shower, a bacholerette party … Am I suppose to give a gift at all these things, and then for the wedding too?
Post # 3
Etiquette Snob here… lol
Presents are not required for an Engagement Party.
That said, there are certainly people who bring them… something small towards the future ($ 25 Gift Card)
Or even a bottle of wine, wrapped up for the Host / Guests of Honour… in the same way that you’d not come empty handed to a House Party etc.
On the otherhand, a card is always appropriate !!
Hope this helps,
Post # 4
Ooops missed the other Questions…
If you are invited to the Shower… and decide to go, then YES a Gift is required. As that is the whole purpose of having a shower.
Bachelorette… If you are invited.. then YES you’d be expected to pay something towards the Bride’s share. If after hearing the plans and amount, it is too rich for your wallet you can respectfully decline (not attending = not contributing)
Wedding Presents are always optional / not required. Altho for most people the custom is to give one (in the very least a card).
The amount of the Gift you give should be determined by how close you are to the Bride / Couple, and what you can afford.
There is no other rules… so you don’t have to “cover your plate” (myth) nor should you adjust your amount based on the type of Wedding / Celebration that the couple chooses to have.
Hope this helps,
Post # 5
ok cool. i was planning to give for the shower, bachlorette, and wedding – it just seems like to have an engagement party on top of that seems excessive.
note – i just got married in April 2013 … and our parents forced us to have a shower.
Post # 6
I have never given a gift for an engagement party OR a bachelorette (except obviously buying the bride drinks, ect.) It isn’t done in my circles, though a card for the engagement party is nice. I only give gifts for showers and the wedding. And of course if I’m at a time in my life when I cant’ afford something, like a bachelorette to Vegas, I politely decline.
Post # 7
@jen 42713: i had an engagement party in july and only two out of 40 people brought a gift (each brought a bottle of wine). i would probably do the same. i wouldn’t go empty handed, just in case…