(Closed) Engagement Party

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
Member
1186 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

This is actually what we’re planning as well.  We just got engaged in August, wont be getting married til summer 2017 and my mom wants to throw an eengagement party probably next spring or summer. Its fine by me, I don’t really care either way.  She’s the host, so she gets to decide when it is.  We also have a really busy fall and the holidays will be busy of course, so u won’t miss it.  I figure everyone will still have the initial excitement about the engagement through the holidays and then the engagement party will be a nice way to keep the excitement going.  I wouldn’t find it weird if it were someone else.  Everyone knows we are having a long engagement.

Post # 3
Member
9182 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

An engagement party is to celebrate getting engaged. Throwing one a year after living as an engaged couple seems redundant to me. Engagement parties are common here but are always thrown within a month or two of the actual engagement. Any longer without a really good reason (like deployment) gets a major eye roll from people as attention seeking.

Post # 4
Member
528 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2016 - Long Island, NY

I’ve been to MANY engagement parties that have been thrown a long time after engagement. When you’re having a long engagement, it’s nice to throw a party somewhere in the middle to celebrate. I have been to many engagement parties that were thrown 6 months to a year after engagement, and they’re just as exciting as if they had been thrown right away. 

I do not think it is attention grabbing. We had ours about 8 months after getting engaged and almost exactly 1 year to the date of our marriage. Our friends and family had all agreed that summer was easiest (and as I am a teacher, it worked out well for me!) to get together and so we waited. Everyone was just excited they got to celebrate with us.

Post # 5
Member
2076 posts
Buzzing bee

I think having an engagement party a year after the engagement happened is a bit silly.  The point of the party is to celebrate the engagement.  Would you throw a graduation party a year after you graduate?  Would you throw a first birthday party for your kid a year after he/she turned one?  No because the time to celebrate those things has come and gone.  So if the party is thrown anywhere after 3 months after the engagement happened I would say that you should just nix the party.

Just because you have decided to have a long engagement has zero bearing on when an engagement party should be thrown.  Also, you should not be throwing this party (not sure if that was the plan) because you never throw a party in your own honor.  I would say enjoy being engaged and enjoy the wedding planning and just forget about the engagement party.  But then again I don’t understand the point of engagement parties.

Post # 6
Member
1351 posts
Bumble bee

I would do an eye roll if I were invited to an engagement party a year after the fact, to be completely honest. Then again, I never had one or have been to one, since my friends and I have only done showers and then the wedding. 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 2 months ago by  beetruz13.
Post # 7
Member
2803 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I would do one now or not at all.

We have a two year engagement as well. My mother had intended on throwing us one, but time and life events last year kinda got the best of her and us. It never would have crossed my mind to have one at the one year mark, because it just seems like too much time has passed, it’s old news, weddings coming soon anyhow…. Not sure how to out put it, but the idea just doesn’t seem right. If you wait, you may see it the same way.

If you want one, do it now. It doesn’t have to be some grand affair. 

Post # 8
Member
6945 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

I agree with the other PPs that say it’s strange to have an engagement party long after you’ve become engaged. I know if I was invited to an engagement party for a couple that had already been engaged for almost a year I would be super confused. I’m not saying I wouldn’t go, I’d just find the whole thing rather silly. 

Post # 9
Member
240 posts
Helper bee

I think you should have it soon. Its meant to celebrate a fresh engagement. I think waiting too long would be odd. You can still have a bridal shower later though. 

Post # 10
Member
692 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
cupcake25:  we got engaged 11/26/14 and our engagement party was 5/30/15… and it wasn’t weird or anything… i know many people that had engagement parties WAY after they got engaged. do what makes you happy, have a great party where you get to enjoy the spotlight and well wishers and toasts… throw that party whenever you can. 

Post # 11
Member
1186 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

View original reply
j_jaye:  I think it’s a little offensive to assume that someone is attention seeking for this.  If she’s throwing the party for herself, I can see you point, but it’s pretty rude to throw an engagement party for yourself in the first place.  But if someone else is throwing the engagement party for you, you should be receptive to when they want to throw it.  If you have a choice, I’d say sooner is better.  

Post # 12
Member
2200 posts
Buzzing bee

I think its strange to celebrate getting engaged a year later.  If you want to have some kind of party in a year go for it, but it doesn’t have to be an engagement party.

Post # 13
Member
631 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
freckles071611:  I agree 100% an engagement party should be immediately after to celebrate.

Post # 14
Member
2445 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Our engagement party was a year after the fact. My sister-in-law was really excited when we got engaged (March) and wanted to throw us a party that summer but got busy with a bunch of things and it never happened. We were very flattered but never expected one so we didn’t push it. Since we had a 2 year engagement, my bff really felt like we should have something to celebrate in the middle so she offered to throw one for us the following May! So a year before our wedding. It was really sweet of her. We invited immediately family and closest friends (most of them were in the wedding party) and no one thought it was attention grabby at all. We requested no gifts and my mom made a bunch of food and my bff’s mom made dessert and it was great! We played a couple games and drank. Low key and super fun!

Post # 15
Member
549 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015 - Fairmont Banff Springs Hotel

View original reply
cupcake25:  My Mother-In-Law just threw us an engagement party last weekend and my Fiance and I have been engaged since August 2013 (so over 2 years!) I think she must have gotten confused because she said she wanted to throw it within 3 months of our wedding, and I thought the rule was to have it within 3 months of getting ENGAGED. Either way, I totally thought it was weird going into it but it ended up being really nice. It was just for immediate family and our bridal party/their dates and it started off the final countdown to our wedding really nicely 🙂

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