(Closed) Engagement party?

posted 5 years ago in Engagement
Post # 2
Member
275 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I also got engaged a couple months ago and am running into the same issues about the holiday timing. I’m not convinced that we really need to have an engagement party tbh, but if we do I think we’re going to wait until January at least. I don’t think there’s a time limit on this kind of thing.

As for worrying about being gift grabby, you can always tell people that ask not to bring anything. I don’t know if I’d consider an engagement party a gift giving event, personally.

Post # 3
Member
9262 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
futuremrssousa :  I’m in the midwest US and people here don’t throw their own engagement party. It’s seen as attention-seeking and gift-grabby. Most people don’t even have one, but when they do, it’s mainly for the two families to meet. If the bride and groom have different groups of friends, sometimes a friend throws it for the two sets of friends to mingle, but for the most part, it’s just family since there’s a chance they’ll be seeing each other at holidays etc. If someone asked “when’s the engagement party” I would say “I haven’t heard that anyone is planning one.”

Post # 4
Member
3323 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

Usually here engagement ‘parties’ are thrown within a few months of the engagement. Holding a party 1 year after your engagement, to celebrate your engagement seems pointless. It would be like having a housewarming party after you’ve lived there for a year. It also comes off less gift grabby if it’s more immediate.

So I would say if you’re having a party, have it soon. Generally bad taste to throw a party in your own honour, however if you’re doing more a family meet and greet, you could just host a dinner party for family.

Post # 5
Member
665 posts
Busy bee

We got engaged in November 2015 and threw our own engagement party (actually, the wording on the invites was “celebratory lunch” lol) the following March. We hosted lunch, champagne, and cupcakes in the event space of a local restaurant and only invited immediate family and the bridal party– mainly, we wanted it as a way for everyone to meet.

Post # 6
Member
927 posts
Busy bee

I had an engagement party last month and will be married in March. I am not going to have a Bridal Shower for the whole “looks like were asking for gifts again” thing. Our engagement party had all the same people that I would have had at my bridal shower too. Next up bacherlorette party (which I really could live without as well) and then wedding. I just want to marry the man of my dreams. It cannot come fast enough.

Post # 7
Member
200 posts
Helper bee

TBH, I’ve never heard of engagement parties until my friend threw one for himself with just his friends and his Fiance. I thought it was really weird…Usually your family will have one in your honour, but I’ve never heard of you throwing one for yourself. I would host a dinner with two families, but I wouldn’t call it an engagement party. 

Post # 8
Member
1167 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

See I think this very regional.  Every couple I know has technically “thrown themselves” an engagement party.  Some people bring gifts, others don’t.  We got engaged in January of this year and had ours in March.  Most people gave us cards with no money, but some brought flowers or wine.  The only “thing” we got was champagne flutes which were lovely.  I would go off what is usual in your area.  I also don’t believe you need an excuse to throw a party either!

Post # 9
Member
1377 posts
Bumble bee

We had an engagement party 3 months after we got engaged. We said no presents. People brought champaigne and flowers anyways.

Typically people dont bring gifts to an engagement party, maybe just a card. It wont look gift grabby, but as PP’s have said, someone should host on your behalf.

Post # 10
Member
5387 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
futuremrssousa :  I had an engagement party about 4 months after we got engaged. My mom gave us one but it was a low key dinner for only family and a few close friends. About 20 people only. We used a private room of a restaurant. We also knew ahead of time that it will be a really long engagement and nowhere even close to the bridal shower and bachelorette parties.

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