Post # 1
How do you feel about waiting 6.5 months after the real enagement for the engagement party? we want to have the party in the warm weather outdoors, but that requeires waiting til april or may… hmm…
also, we were thinking of having our immediate familys cook some food and have the extended family come and mingle. good idea? 🙂
also, i’ve read various threads on this, but i am still not sure of the answer, i know people didnt get gifts at their party, but i know i’d bring something… would you?
We want to have a housewarming as well, but don’t want to seem like money-grubbers! housewarmng was always planned for next year.. but now, i dont know. too many parties??
Sorry, thats like 4 more questions than I meant to ask!
Any opinions and info is appreciated!!
Post # 3
anyone? pick a question haha… 🙂
Post # 4
We were “officially” engaged around Xmas, and had an engagement party in June. I don’t see a problem with the time period, since we are planning for next September.
We still have to write thank-yous… T.T
Post # 5
@surkim: thanks. 🙂 glad to know im not waiting too long!
Post # 6
I don’t want to be a downer but I would think it strange if someone held an engagement party so long after their engagement. But then again I don’t know anyone who has had an engagment party at all. Maybe it’s a regional thing? I don’t think I would bring a present to an engagement party besides a hostess gift (chocolates, wine, etc.) because, and maybe this is presumptuous on my part, if I knew the bride well I would assume I’m getting an invite to a shower and bachelorette. Most of the bachelorettes I’ve been to people give presents so, if you include an engagement party and the wedding itself, that would be four gifts!
As for the housewarming party, that sounds really lovely. You can just phrase the invites like, “Mr. and Mrs. Fox are throwing a party to celebrate their new digs”. Okay, so maybe not that informal but something casual so people don’t feel obligated to bring presents.
Post # 7
We had our engagement party 7 months after our engagement but a year and 2 months before the wedding. We wanted nice weather, and I’m pretty sure our guests appreciated it!
Post # 8
We have been engaged for a year and we are just having our engagement party this month. We are having a 2 year engagement and we are now officially 1 year away. We thought we would have the party as a kick-off to all of the wedding celebrations.
Post # 9
I didn’t get an engagement party 🙁
Post # 10
We’ve been engaged since May ’10, and my parents are thrwoing us a party this month.. I think it was ridiculous but my mom wanted to do it! I am afraid of what people will think of it, but I would of been fine without it.
Post # 11
We had our engagement party 7 months after we got engaged, and 10 months before the wedding. My parents hosted and my mom made most of the food. Although we didn’t put it specifically in the invites, I asked my mom to spread the word that we did not want gifts (to us the point was for our closest friends and family to meet and get to know each other). All of my relatives gave us BB&B gift cards. Initially I was so embarassed, but I found out that they knew I asked for no gifts, but that they know we’re just getting started and all agreed they wanted to help a little.
I don’t think the housewarming is a bad idea, especially if after all the wedding stuff you specify ‘no gifts.’ I do have a close friend, however, who expressed her frustration with a mutual friend who has had many such parties in a row. The first friend is feeling like the gift-giving never ends. Some people may be bothered, others will not.
Post # 12
We were engaged in May and waited until September to have our engagement party – waited til the weather was slightly better (Southern Hemisphere), gave us a chance to save (hosted it at a bar/restaurant) and gave us a chance to work out our wedding guest list as I didn’t want to invite anyone that we would not invite to the wedding. As you aren’t getting married until 2013, I think any time in the start of 2012 would be fine 🙂
Is there any way you could combine the two celebrations? In NZ, I think the reverse etiquette is usually the case – no one tends to bring more than a hostess gift to a housewarming whereas an engagement is a gift-giving event. As long as you make it clear that you don’t expect anything more than their presence, I think it would be fine to have both.
Post # 13
I think as long as the engagement party is closer to the engagement than the wedding, you’ll be fine!