Post # 1
Hi Bees! I’m new here. My fiance and I just got engaged on Saturday. Everyone keeps asking to see us/the ring, so we figured it might be easiest to throw an engagement party next weekend. Neither of us has a big enough apartment to host more than maybe 8 people, so we’re planning on reserving a private room at a local bar. It’s going to be very casual (cash bar, no gifts), but I’m worried about calling it an “engagement party.” My biggest concern is that we will offend people that we invite to this casual get-together if we don’t invite them to the wedding. Because it’s such a casual party, do we have to invite everyone to the wedding?
Post # 3
@mollyml05: If you are organizing an engagement party, you really shouldn’t invite anyone to the party who is not invited to the wedding.
If you are invited to the engagement party, it is assumed you are invited to the wedding too.
Post # 4
Yeah- I agree, don’t invite people you won’t be inviting to the wedding. Let the people who ‘just want to see the ring’ see it another time if you don’t want them at your wedding as well.
Post # 5
I agree with PPs – if you’re having any celebration relating to the engagement, even if it’s casual, you really should only invite those who will be invited to the wedding – with the caveat that if you’re doing something like a small destination wedding, and a bigger party once you return, it’s OK to invite people who aren’t invited to the Destination Wedding – but even then, they should also be on your invite list for the bigger party.
Post # 6
Because you’re asking about etiquette, I would add that’s it’s considered poor taste to throw an engagement party for yourself.
Don’t call it anything but a get-together (no engagment references). That way, you can invite anyone you want (nix invites to keep it super casual) without worrying about a future guest list.