Post # 1
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
- Wedding: February 2015 - Casa Feliz
Hey bees. We did our engagement photos yesterday and while I absolutely love the work our photographer/friend does, I can’t help but worry a bit about the photos. I’m very self conscious, to a point that is almost unreasonable…you see, I used to model when I was younger and was 11 pounds lighter. (I know it’s only 10 pounds, but I can definitely see the difference in my body.) I used to be very happy to have my picture taken and was quite photogenic, but now all I can worry about is how certain parts of my body will look in the photos. I can’t even have fun. Our photographer showed me the photos – and they were quite beautiful, but out of habit I didn’t even look at the landscape or even my fiance, but straight at my arms to see how “fat” they looked. Then if they look even just a little bad, I don’t like the whole photo. It’s terrible. I’ve lost about 9 pounds (I was 20 pounds overweight from my modeling weight) but I am still not self-confident and don’t feel pretty.
I really don’t want to be disappointed about my photos just because of my insecurities. Am I being stupid? Have any of you encountered this? How would you handle this?
Post # 2
Member
2347 posts
Buzzing bee
lumosplease: This is a tough one, because (and I think you know this) the problem is in your own head. You’re looking to address the symptom (not liking your photos), but that stuff won’t go away until you work on the other part (not liking yourself). When I start to feel really bad about myself, usually the problem is that I’ve been thinking about ME, ME, ME too much. Volunteering or doing things for others helps ground me. I have done lots of work with people who have extreme disabilities. It’s hard to feel bad about your arm fat after spending the afternoon with someone who has no arms. I know that sounds snarky, but I don’t mean it in that way. Gratitude is an amazing thing. I’m sure your pictures are gorgeous.
Post # 3
Member
1378 posts
Bumble bee
- Wedding: February 2015 - Chapel on Base
Yes! Some people would love to deal with only an 11 extra pounds and worry about only their arms. I can’t wait to see them. I’m sure you will be beautiful.
Post # 4
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
- Wedding: February 2015 - Casa Feliz
Thank you girls. I appreciate your comments. I will definitely post the photos when I get them. 🙂
Post # 5
Member
466 posts
Helper bee
I am heavier than I would like to be and when I first saw previews of my engagement photos all I did was obsess over different body parts and my appearance. Then the next day I got all the photos and after sleeping on it my whole outlook had changed. I loved them. Obviously there are a few I didn’t feel were flattering, but for the most part I just saw how in love we are and how happy we look together. Now I love them and I’m actually really happy with how I look. Do I wish I were thinner? Sure. Am I dwelling on it? Nope. They’re great pics and we look great in them.
Hopefully you’ll have a similar experience!
Post # 6
Member
9076 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
You need to fix what is going internally (In your head) in order to accept what the world will see externally.
Post # 7
Member
1729 posts
Bumble bee
I think your feelings are normal as long as you don’t dwell upon it too much. At least, I hope it is, because I definitely had similar feelings about my photos. Overall, I love them but it was hard to stop myself from nitpicking my appearance.
I’m sure that what you notice will not be noticed by others. They will see that you are your fiance are happy and in love! Also, 11 lbs is likely unnoticeable to the vast majority of people even if you notice every ounce.
Post # 8
Member
69 posts
Worker bee
- Wedding: February 2015 - Casa Feliz
Thank you all. I’m going to try to be more positive when loking at photos…like you said, some other people may not notice anything about me that I’m self conscious about. I need to remind mself that I have what matters – a loving fiance who thinks I’m beautiful! Thank you 🙂