Post # 1
Ok being honest here, well my fiance proposed on a day that was extremely special to us, it was perfect the day he picked. i was glowing and on top of the world.
one thing is i am very simple in all i do, i dont like jewellery and roses and all that jazz, but when it came to an engagement and since he was soo keen on it i was waiting expectedly and indeed it was all amazing, it was so personal and just like us.
but the ring seemed to bother me a bit. long ago he said one day how i ll be having a white gold diamond ring for our engagemnt and i listened and expectedly waited. on the day of our engagement though, whne he opened the box, it was a yellow gold ring (which looked like white gold because of the stones), mind you i dont wear yellow gold and he knows that neither does he cuz he hates yellow gold himself! but he said he picked this cuz it can be fooled to look like white gold as well and that he thoughht this ring reprsented the best of both white gold and yellow gold. it was a curved band of zircons, 13 to be precise, and to see few of my other friends had the very same ring!!
now my fiance is my best freind and i run to him for everything!! i have spoken to him about it as well and questioned him on why he picked out something which was sooo unlike him and me as well. i feel so bad that i have become incredibly materialistic. he listens and he says lets change it, but i keep saying no no we cant do that, cuz u spent so much time picking a ring for me. but deep inside i want to and i feel bad abt it.
he also looked for diamond rings but he said he thought the one he picked for me looked the best. but i told him how much that sentecnce he told me years ago was the ring i pictured. and it does upset him but i dont mean bad, because he is amazing and gave me the best day of my life and the ring is just a thing, but that dream he gave me was something i really loved.
and was soo worried as to why he picked otherwise. he is ever ready to change it to something we both agree on adn we have but i just dont want to admit it cuz howevr dispappointed of a zircon engagemnt ring i am, i loved it cuz of his heart, but then a ring is not really what his heart is all about so i shudnt feel as bad.
i dont know.. any suggestions?
Post # 3
Welcome to WB! I’m a little confused by some parts of your post, but a couple things stand out to me though — you were expecting (because you were told to) both a diamond, and white gold, and got a cubic zirconia ring in yellow gold, right? The gold color thing is weird to me though because in general, one color gold is not really more expensive than another (in the same purity, like 14k to 14k). So, why would he not just buy the color he knew you liked (instead of one that could “fool” someone to think it looked like it)? That aside, you said you both have agreed on swapping the ring for something you really like, right? I guess I just don’t understand why you are feeling so bad about wanting the change. As far as I can tell, you’ve already brought it up to him, so you already know how he is reacting to you not liking the ring since it isn’t your taste and isn’t what you thought he would pick for you. That can be a really tough thing to talk about initially, but if he’s open to the change, I say, you should take him up on it. Good luck! 🙂
Post # 4
heyy what i meant by fool as in, is that it actually looks like white gold from the front because of the stones! and i did not say i dont like the ring 🙂 it is beautiful and i love it but not for our engagement ring. i feel bad because apart from whether it looks like that ring he said long ago, he still picked that one and that really matters.
Post # 5
i meant doesnt look like what he visualized to me before.and another problem is that i cant wear it with my wedding ring because of the curve which means i need to wear it on my other hand!
and currently on my engagement finger the ring is one size bigger but on the right hand it fits just right as that fiinger is larger. so if i am keepin this there is no point sizing the ring as it cant be worn with my wedding ring
Post # 6
I think that if he is open to it, you should get a ring that will make both of you happy – one that you can wear with your wedding band and looks like what you had imagined he would propose with. Otherwise you may always look at your current ring and think about what it isn’t, instead of what it represents.
Post # 7
i do want to keep the ring not because of guilt but because he gave it to me and it is beautiful 🙂 he suggested that he will get me another one someday like how he described back then which i can wear with my wedding ring.
so im glad 🙂 i definitely dont want to get rid of this because i do love it and its a wonderful memory for me.
thank u for ur advice 🙂
Post # 8
I dont think I understand what your saying? But if you worked it out then cool I guess?