(Closed) Engagement ring but no proposal….

posted 5 years ago in Proposals
Post # 2
Member
2746 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Could you ask him if it’s a promise ring?

Post # 3
Member
1142 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

He bought you the ring you wanted as an engagement ring as a regular ‘ol ring? No, he has no interest in marrying you. What a piggish thing to do. I would have been half tempted to put it on and deck him in the face with it.

Post # 4
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

Wow …that’s just wierd. I’m sorry.

If you want that ring as your engagement ring, give it back to him and tell him that you want him to hold onto it. That when he is serious and ready to discuss marriage, this is the ring you want to wear for the rest of your life as an engagement ring.  

Tell him to hand over the receipt too…lol (so he can’t return it again).

Maybe he’s really just not ready to commit yet. How long has it been since your break up? Maybe he doesn’t understand that you would feel funny wearing it on another finger. Maybe he plans on getting you a different ring to propose with as this ring was a failed engagement ring.

So many maybe ‘ s.  

Post # 6
Member
6447 posts
Bee Keeper

maggie818:  No, I would be heartbroken as well.  I don’t think this relationship is going in the direction you want it to be.  He gave you a ring that was originally an ering as a regular ring.  I thought you were going to say he didn’t ask you, but wanted you to wear it on your left finger.  I think I would take another break and really think about where your relationship is going.

Post # 7
Member
2746 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

maggie818:  I understand. I’m sorry that this happened. 

Post # 9
Member
9226 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

smoocherific:  I agree, that is super weird. Wow. What man thinks it’s a good idea to get his SO a ring that she’s said she wants as her engagement ring as a non-engagement ring? I’m sorry, OP. I would talk with your SO about where you stand in your relationship and give him the ring back. I’d feel silly wearing it too.

Post # 12
Member
9226 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

maggie818:  “Giving it back would probably put him into some sort of frenzy.”

This is not a reason that I would keep it. I would still give it back to him and say, “This is an engagement ring. We are not engaged. If you would like to give this back to me when we get engaged, feel free.”

Post # 13
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

TheGridMonster:   well some men just don’t get things.

I can see him thinking “She loves this ring…I’m getting it for her” not even thinking of proposing. Just he knew she liked it..

He probably didn’t even think of what finger she’d out it on. For all we know he thinks women wear solitairs on all fingers. Toes too! He could just be really dense when it comes to things like that.  Like I’d be with a man that wanted a specific tool for some project he really wanted…so I got him the kick ass tool he wanted…only he didn’t actually need it and it was the wrong size and he hadn’t even started the project yet. (Tools are like some giant mystery to me) 

 Or..it’s a shut up ring.  He doesn’t want to propose. He wants to pacify you and shut you up about engagements and marriage. 

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 11 months ago by  smoocherific. Reason: Didn't finish typing grr
Post # 14
Member
9226 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

smoocherific:  Idk, all the unmarried males I’ve known (no matter how clueless) were absolutely terrified every holiday to get their girlfriends anything in a tiny box because they didn’t want to get her hopes up. i think it’s extremely thoughtless of him not to even consider the possibiilty that she might be misled, so he gets no pass from me.

Post # 15
Member
493 posts
Helper bee

This is probably one of the weirdest stories I have ever heard.  Getting an engagement ring as a regular ring??? … I cant believe you held it together infront of him.  I would keep it and wear it on your left hand finger around family and friends but only when hes WITH you, and let him deal with the awkward questions and congrats of being engaged.  If he doesn’t think it was a dumb thing to do now, he will then.  Seriously though, what would he say?? “uhhh ya I got her an engagement ring as a gift, but we aren’t enagaged” – awkward! 

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  • This reply was modified 4 years, 11 months ago by  KB87.

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