(Closed) Engagement ring question?!

posted 9 years ago in Rings
Post # 17
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I would wait until he see’s it. He might open the box snd be like, umm this isn’t really what I was expecting and send it back.

Post # 18
6317 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

@Kaitykait23:  I realize you’re poor college students but I’d be upset if my guy got me such a flawed diamond. $166 is ridiculous… what exactly does he expect? I’m sorry but especially if you bff told him not to get it, I don’t understand why he’d do this. Has he never heard the phrase ‘you get what you pay for’? I’d be insulted. It sounds like your promise ring cost more.

I’m not saying here that he should have spent more money if he couldn’t afford it, but I think it’s kind of insensitive to get you something so far off the mark. I realize guys don’t always know a lot about diamonds, but I am not sure what he’s expecting for under $200. He could have bought you a nice gem stone and said that you’ll upgrade later or something.

I guess you can see what it looks nice, but I don’t see why you should have to wear it if it ends up looking awful. I guess this is what happens when you snoop, but I can’t say I would have done anything different.

Post # 19
2674 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@Kaitykait23:  Here are a couple other options just so you can get a feel for whats out there:

$290: .31 Carat, J, VS2, Good Cut, Princess


$480: 0.42 Carat, I, SI2, Very Good Cut, Princess


$400: 0.25 Carat, D, VS1, Good Cut, Princess


$680: .55 Carat, K, SI1, Ideal Cut, Princess


Post # 20
2674 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Size is really personal preference. I know when I was looking I wanted .5ct because I have small fingers and thought anything else would look too big/be too expensive. I ended up with a 1ct asscher because apparently my Fiance had a lot more saved up than I thought he did and he wanted to get me something larger, though it looks smaller because the shape faces up small.

There are plenty of women out there with .5ct or .25ct and it looks great on them. In your situation, I would go as small as .25 ct. Ideally I would look for something that is SI1 or better in clarity, but some SI2 or I1 stones have inclusions in locations where you can’t see them once set, which would be fine with me. Color doesn’t bother me so  I don’t really see a problem with an I J or K colored stone. Some women actually prefer a diamond with “lower quality” color.

ETA: Those are only 4 examples of what I found online. There are hundreds of other good, inexpensive diamonds on those sites alone. Those prices do not include a setting, which you might want to get off of etsy or at a local jeweler.

Post # 21
12 posts
  • Wedding: January 2002

CZs are ok as an alternative. Having said that, why don’t you look into moissanite as well. Much better story to go with moissanite. [post moderated for self promotion]

Post # 22
3954 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

If I were you, I wouldn’t do anything. Well, I would never have snooped in his email, but that’s a different story. You know you’re getting a starter ring and that you are young college students so right now, it is entirely about the sentimental value of this ring. It’s not going to be ugly, it just will look like a low quality diamond but I’m sure it means a lot to him. Once you guys have jobs and save up a little, you can swap it out for a good quality stone. I would just focus on being excited about getting engaged 🙂 

Post # 23
63 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Personally I chose a smaller diamond with better colour and clarity. I could have had a .5ct J I2 but chose a 0.3ct G VS1 because of the sparkle factor! BUT at the end of the day, like you said a plastic bag would have been fine!

See how you feel when you wear it, the website says it’s got an exchange policy so you have options!

Post # 24
1470 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@Kaitykait23:  If these “girls” can’t understand that you guys are still in college and in the beginning phases of your lives together and he can’t afford a nicer diamond right now, well, who the hell cares. Let them know this is just your starter ring and you will get a better quality ring when he is done with school. If he cares this much about getting you a diamond when he is broke with no money, imagine what he is going to swap that bad boy with when he’s done with residency and starts getting some nice paychecks! All in due time. 🙂 

My bf just started his last year of residency last month. We are shopping at rings (he hasn’t proposed yet, though) and have recently decided that we will get a beautiful setting with great quality diamonds in the setting and keep a nice cz as the center stone for a while. Poor guy didn’t realize how expensive quality + quantity loose diamonds go for and he said he started sweating and felt his blood pressure rise when a jeweler quoted him a price for what he was looking for, lol. I felt so bad for him and I INSISTED that we keep the cz in there (the rings I’m looking at already have a nice cz in the center stone that come with the ring) even though he didn’t want to at first and even suggested he get a low quality diamond for now just so it’s a “diamond” and I told him absolutely not. What a waste of money that would be! I honestly could care less what people will think to not have a diamond in there. And in my social circle, there will be talk. When he’s closer to finishing residency and getting a real job next year, he is going to swap the cz with a diamond which is fine since all I care is to have the diamond in there by the day of the wedding for pictures and sentimental reasons. 

Wear your ring with pride. I’m not going to lie and say it’s probably not going to look “that bad”, because based on its stats and price, it doesn’t sound like it’s going to look great. But it’s very noble and sweet of him to even want to get you a diamond when he’s a broke, college student. People will talk, who cares! You know that this is not going to be on your finger forever and it’s a symbol that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you, which is all that matters. I wouldn’t say anything about changing the ring or not being happy about it’s quality right now, you really don’t want to burst his bubble. Especially when I’m sure he probably knows it’s not a quality ring and he wishes he can get you better, but in his eyes, he’s getting you a diamond and he’s probably happy and excited about that. 

Post # 25
13 posts
  • Wedding: July 1992

A K color diamond is just flat out a grey and funky color diamond. And I3 clarity means visible inclusions and not just little ones. 

I’d rather have a 1/10th carat G or H diamond with a minimum of SI clarity. It wouldn’t cost much but it would look white and sparkle.

I wouldn’t go with cz as they don’t hold up

I’m a jeweler and blog about the four C’s of diamonds and diamonds vs cz’s and other choices of gemstones.

Diamonds trump cz’s but crappy diamonds do not.

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