(Closed) Engagement/Wedding Ring set, temp jobs and money

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
Member
4714 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 1998

I think that you should just be yourself

if you are still concerned/worried then you in my opinion you should change your last name and wear your band only…contact your references and tell them you changed your last name and then you will be ok….good luck

Post # 4
Member
2031 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I would only change my name if you were willing to do this before thinking of changing jobs.  If you weren’t going to change your name before, don’t do it now.  

As for the rings, I would wear what you would wear to work.  If you’ll be working with chemicals and would leave the engagement ring home, then skip it for the interview.  Not that they should be looking at those things (and they might not be) but at least then you’ll be consistent.  Don’t change who you are for a job interview, or you’ll have to change who you are forever.  

On a side note, the last time I had a job interview I was still engaged (the first time), so I wore my engagement ring (which included a wrap) and didn’t think a thing of it…I don’t know that anyone noticed.  

Post # 5
Member
764 posts
Busy bee

Regardless of whatever you change your last name to, they will do background,degree and everything else verification. I dont get why being Hispanic, or perceived to be married to a hispanic is seen as negative for your job search. If they re that bad-do you reallyw any to work there??  As for the engagement ring. I don’t get the whole ” she doesn’t need a job because of her huge ring.” viewpoint.  How big is this diamond!!?? 

Post # 6
Member
900 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

mmm…I don’t get the ring thing either, but I don’t work in a scientific field.  As far as as the Spanish-sounding last name goes, I would think in this day and age, in a scientific field, that them thinking you are a minority can only help.

I sometimes wonder if I *don’t* get called for interviews because my name is so all-american and “white” to be honest.  I’m looking forward to changing my surname to my fiance’s name, which is more ethnic (he’s from another country), because I feel like it automatically makes people think I’m more openminded, blah blah, etc.  It’s silly, but I think people DO judge names.

I got an interview at an extremely prestigious international-firm.  When I went to the interview, I was literally the only american white bread in the room.  They asked me several questions about if I felt I had an “international outlook”, and asked me how I feel I “get along with people who are different than me”, which frankly, I felt like was ONLY asked because I am so typically “american”.  I was a bit offended.  I speak two other languages at a conversational level, I’ve traveled extensively to every continent except Australia and Antartica, I’ve lived in other countries, my Fiance is another race AND another religion AND from other country.  I feel like I’m pretty damn well “international”.  But oh wait.  I’m white, I’m american, and I’m from Texas.  I must be Sarah Palin.  ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 8
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

If you were planning on changing it – change it. If you weren’t – don’t. I do, however, think that you should only wear the wedding band for the interview.

Post # 9
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m a lab manager, and as far as I’m concerned there aren’t enough women in the sciences! I know where I’m at no one would give your ring or your last name a second glance. Don’t worry about it! ๐Ÿ™‚

 

Post # 10
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

It isn’t right, but names DO impact your marketability. If that is the case in your field, and you’d have an advantage with a European last name, change it! Even if only for your resume. You can have different personal and professional last names.

Same for the rings. Are you more likely to get hired or a higher sallery without the rings? Don’t wear them. In my case, I felt being married was an advantage in my field, so I wore my wedding band to interviews (but I probably would not wear a big engagement ring).

It would be nice if these advantages/biases did not exist, but they do. I don’t see the logic in ignoring that fact on principle. If going by your married name will give you more opportunities, or make your life easier, why would you keep your maiden name?

Post # 11
Member
395 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 1969

Oh, and as for references, I’m pretty sure you’re not the first woman to change her last name after marriage lol. It won’t be a problem.

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