Post # 1
What is the proper etiquette for getting a bridesmaid’s hair and make up done? I know most of the time it is up to the bridesmaid to opt in or out of a professional harid and makeup job and her own expense.
I am planning on paying for my MOH’s hair and makeup, and allowing the rest of the bridal party to choose what they’d like to pay for. I don’t want to force them to pay for it if they want to do it themselves; I’m not that particular. I’d love to pay for all of them but, truth be told, I’d rather use that money elsewhere in the budget.
What are you doing for your BMs? Former BMs, did you have your hair and makeup paid for or did you pay for it yourself?
Post # 3
@MrsDrRose612: I paid for all my BMs hair and makeup.
When I was a bridesmaid I did my own makeup and paid for my own hair, but it was my choice to pay for it or do it myself. I’m just not good at doing my own hair so I decided to pay for it.
I think as long as you aren’t requiring them to get it professionally done then you can just send out an e-mail saying “so-and-so will be doing my hair and makeup on the wedding day, if you would like to have your hair or makeup (or both) done let me know so we can make sure the schedule works out. Cost for hair is X and cost for makeup is X.”
That way you let them know that the option is there but they don’t have to take it.
Post # 4
In 3 wedding I was in, my hair and MU was paid for. In 1, 1 option was paid for and the other was optional. For my girls, they paid for the own hair/mu, but both were optional. I thought it was fair, since they didnt have to buy a bm dress. I think if you are requiring it, you should pay. Otherwise, it’s up to them if they want to pay for it.
Post # 5
I agree. If you aren’t requiring them to do it, then you don’t need to pay for it. I am paying for my Mom to have her hair and makeup done. Only because she never wears makeup and has short hair that she does nothing to…she looks great, but I want her to feel great too so I think it’s worth the money. Other than that I left it up to my girls. All want to get their hair done and I think one of two (my sister and my FSIL) may get their makeup done as well.
Post # 6
When I was a bridesmaid (all three times), I paid for my hair myself. I wasn’t required to get my makeup done, so I did it myself.
When I got married, I paid for half of everyone’s hair, including readers, my officiant (a friend, etc). So the girls ended up paying about $20 including tip for their hair, and they also had the option to do their own, but all of them were fine with getting it done. I paid for my MOH’s makeup, because I wanted someone to come with me when I went so I wouldn’t be bored.
I think as long as you aren’t requiring anything, especially makeup, since some girls love to do their own, then I don’t think you need to pay for it.
Post # 7
I am having 2 makeup artists come out. The 1st is an airbrush ( i have tattoos) I told the other girls that they do not have to get this done because it is pricey-
my Maid/Matron of Honor wants to do airbrush and is willing to pay for this.
However,3 of my girls do not wear makeup and would not even beging to know how to apply it. I have a friend that does Mary Kay, and i arranged with her to come and do all the girls makeup for basically free!! I just asked my girls to all give her a tip of $5-$10 each.
I know several Mary Kay reps will do it for free or low cost, most of them just ask you host a party, in order to get the color tone of each girl.
As for hair, I have a hair dresser coming in, she is going to be discounted rate but they will pay for this so i am Not requiring them to use her, just want to keep hair styles in the same theme of the wedding. which the only 1 that did not want to use her is well aware of the style i want.
I did buy them all the jewels, shawls/boloros, and vickies items so i thought that this was fair
Post # 8
@MrsDrRose612: If you request that their hair or makeup be done a certain way, its only fair to pay for it. But if you are fine with them showing up as they’d like, its up to them.
I would say though, paying for Maid/Matron of Honor but not the others will more than likely lead to some hurt feelings. I think it has to be an all or nothing thing.
I’m buying mani/pedis for all of my girls – but leaving hair and makeup up to them.
Post # 9
Thanks ladies!! To be clear, I plan to give each girl a nice gift, otherwise I’d probably have gotten them something a bit smaller and also paid for their hair and makeup. They have purchased their own dresses. I definitely don’t feel strongly that they HAVE to get their hair and makeup done…honestly between the 6 of them, they could probably all help each other out and look fantastic. I was hoping giving them the option wouldn’t be tacky or cheap-looking.
Post # 10
I’ve been a bridesmaid 8 times and I have never had hair or makeup paid for. I never hadmy makeup done, as I like how I do my own, but I did opt to go have my hair done. However, I did not use the hair person the bride had in any situation (just my own personal preference.) In none of the weddings, did the bride “require” anything either. For my own wedding, I had a hair and makeup person (again i did my own makeup and hair) available for whomever wanted to use them. i put the offer out, told them how much and let them decide yes or no. I think 3 used my hair person and 2 did their own and one went to a friend of ours. Same with makeup, I let the girls know when and how much and some took me up on it and others didn’t. it all worked outin the end. Mainly, I justmade sure that everyone knew when and where they needed to be dressed and ready to go.
Post # 11
That’s good to know…that’s likely the route I’ll go. You know those threads asking everyone to weigh in on what were aspects of their wedding that they weren’t hugely concerned with? This is one of my main ones. I really don’t mind if they want to do their own makeup and hair (wht the exception of my Maid/Matron of Honor becasue she has enormously long, thick, curly hair and I don’t think any of us would know what to do with it!). If they opted out of what rates offered by whomever I hire, I wouldn’t mind. I just cringe at the thought of sounding cheap.
A good compromise would be for me (or I guess my parents, really) pay for manis/pedis like a PP mentioned.
Post # 12
I don’t know what the proper etiquette would be but as far as I’m concerned, if you want them to have their hair and MU done then you have to pay for it. Bridesmaids should not be made to have to spend extra money on beauty treatments just so they can look extra pretty in the pictures. In your case OP, I think giving them the option is fine since you’re not requiring that they have either done. When it’s a requirement, it’s the brides responsibility.
I paid for all of their hair and my MOH’s makeup, as she expressed interest in having hers done. She was fine with paying for it herself but I covered it for her as an extra “thank you” for being so awesome. I initially didn’t plan on paying for any of their beauty treatments as I knew that they were fully capable of making themselves look presentable but my hair stylist had a minimum that I had to meet in order to book her, so I paid for them. If I had the extra $200 in my budget, I would have loved to pay for my bridesmaids MU (roughly $100 a pop) but I thought that a catered brunch while we were getting ready would make more of an impact. They did their own makeup and they looked gorgeous.
Post # 13
My girls had the option. Surprisingly, most of them opted to get both hair and makeup done professionally, paying for it themselves. When I’ve been a Bridesmaid or Best Man in the past, I’ve always had the option, and I’ve always chosen to get it done, paying for it myself.
Post # 14
@BluegrassBridetoBee: If you aren’t requiring them to do it, then you don’t need to pay for it.
Agreed. While it is available to my Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man I am also not requiring it. My Maid/Matron of Honor is having her hair and makeup done and another Bridesmaid or Best Man is only having her hair done. It is an option that they can take if they choose, otherwise I really don’t care.
Post # 15
Whew, that’s what I thought initially, but wasn’t sure. I’d really rather use that $$ to put towards a really special and commerative gift for each of them. Their hair and make up would only last a few hours…they’re all so close and special to me, I would rather allot that money towards something they can use or keep for a long time!
Post # 16
- Wedding: September 2011 - Bent Creek Winery (Livermore, California); Reception: Family Residence (San Ramon, California)
My sister (MOH) wanted to get her hair done, but she’s particular about her makeup and only likes to do it herself. She didn’t want me to give her a gift, so I just paid for her to get her hair done. Everyone was happy. 🙂
I think you’re under no obligation to pay as long and your BMs know they don’t have to get their hair and makeup done. It sounds like you’re handling everything really well!