Etiquette for spouses/partners walking wedding party down aisle?

posted 3 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 2
97 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I completely understand your hesitation with the age difference – Fiance only felt comfortable with his nieces, my junior bridesmaids, being escorted out by my sister’s boyfriend who is a groomsmen. When we do bridal party introductions, the nieces will come in with FI’s brother who is the best man, and my sister the Maid/Matron of Honor will be escorted in by her boyfriend.

I wouldn’t worry about your bridal party being escorted in by their partners, but if you want to recognize them, you might think about doing so into the reception and have the single bridal party members either together or with someone they’re close to. I’d ask them if they’re uncomfortable being escorted out of the ceremony by the groomsmen, and if they are they could alternate out in a single file line. I’d have each side walk in alone though.

Super thoughtful of you to be concerned, but you might be overthinking it 🙂 

Post # 3
346 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2018

I’d probably skip having the bridal party escorted by their spouses, as i feel like it kind of draws attention to the fact that the spouses aren’t in the party, and also does single out the one single bridesmaid.

The point about acknowledging your partner’s siblings is a good one, though.  Are you being escorted down the aisle by one or two parents? If so, you could have your partner be escorted by his sister, which I think would be veyr sweet. 

you could also skip having the groomsmen walk down the aisle altogether, and just have them standing at the front when the ceremony starts.  That’s what we’re doing, as my partner didn’t want his own aisle walk.  Three individual bridesmaids entering one at a time is plenty of procession, it won’t feel short!

Bridesmaids/groomsmen pairing up to exit probably won’t feel awkward at all — it feels like way fewer people are watching you closely during the exit vs during the entrance!

Basically there are no rules here, though. Do what works for you, just do give a bit of special thought to not singling out that one single bridesmaid. Maybe just check in with her about what she’s comfortable with/if she cares!

Post # 4
4920 posts
Honey bee

They are walking, not f*cking.  Everyone understands what a bridal party is or that walking in a straight line in close proximity to another human being isn’t cheating.  I think you are greatly over thinking this.  Just avoid orgies and you’ll be fine.

Post # 5
5423 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
gisele36 :  You are way over thinking something so simple. Have the bridesmaids walk with the groom’s men. That’s the point of the bridal party and no one will be confused. Guests know what’s going on. It takes a few minutes tops. No one will die and everyone will survive it. 

Post # 6
2460 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

You’re way overthinking this.

They’re walking together for probably less than 30 seconds. It’s not like you’re arranging their marraiges.

Post # 7
9141 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
gisele36 :  Definitely over-thinking. There is no etiquette for this because it’s not done. These are adults who presumably have seen weddings before. Nobody needs the bridal party equivalent of a participation trophy. If they were important enough to require recognition, you would have asked them to stand up with you.

They’re not, you didn’t, and that’s ok.

Most weddings start with the groomsmen standing up front with the groom anyway. I’ve only seen a few where the groomsmen walk down the aisle at the beginning. Yes, they walk down afterwards, but that’s like 2 seconds and everyone is focused on the bride and groom at that point.

Adding partners will give a net negative result since the people with partners don’t gain any benefit, but the people without partners will have that fact publically rubbed in their face. I wouldn’t even do it for the 2 family members you mentioned. It’s sad that your fiance’s parents are deceased, but parents don’t walk bridemaids down the aisle so I don’t understand the idea of subbing FSIL’s husband in. It’s not like asking a brother to walk you down the aisle because your dad is deceased. There’s no tradition to replicate. Regarding your uncle’s wife, if she’s not close enough to call her “Aunt” then she would probably feel weird being part of your wedding party, which she would be if she’s walking down the aisle with the ring-bearer.

Also, 3 bridesmaids and 3 groomsmen is perfectly normal. It’s not a super-short processional, but so what if it was? What does that signify in your mind? Because it doesn’t signify anything at all to anyone else. I’ve never been to a wedding and thought “Nice, but I wish more people would have walked down the aisle.” No need to stress over this, bee. Enjoy your wedding!

Post # 8
293 posts
Helper bee

You are overthinking it! Just have everyone walk individually. Alternate bridesmaids and groomsmen, or do all groomsmen and then all bridesmaids. Or have groomsmen already at the front. I don’t think spouses will feel left out!

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