(Closed) etiquette issue

posted 6 years ago in 40 Something
Post # 3
Member
1211 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

First off, congratulations! 

Second, screw old etiquette. You’re getting married and you’re in love, yay! Wear a gorgeous gown that makes you feel amazing. Just because you’ve been married previously doesn’t mean that this wedding is any less important imo 🙂 

Post # 4
Member
579 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@dreamweaver5521:

who cares that it is your 2nd wedding wear the gown that you feel absolutely beautiful! Congrats on your marriage!

Post # 5
Member
1843 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I agree with the others.  I’m 40 and married for the second time two months ago.  I originally felt like you, that it was expected I should have less of a wedding because it was my second.  Luckily my husband wised me up real quickly and we had the wedding of our dreams and went all out … I wouldn’t have been happy doing it any other way.

Do what is special for you, what will mean the most for you, and what you feel comfortable in!

Post # 6
Member
6344 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2014

I think the idea that you shouldn’t wear a proper wedding gown for a second/third/whatever marriage is pretty old-fashioned; I think it stems from when you were only ‘supposed’ to marry once, and divorce or subsequent marriages were frowned upon and so done in a very low-key way with as little fuss as possible. Whereas now thankfully times have changed, and it is much much more acceptable to divorce and remarry; people are no longer forced to spend their lives in unhappy marriages and have the freedom to move on and start again. So for me, not wearing a proper dress is kind of old-fashioned, and to me personally, it’s a bit like saying it’s not as important second time round. Whereas I think a second marriage is just as special as the first, and should be treated the same.

I can see why some people do want something low-key if they have already been married; they may feel the expense is unnecessary and that they’ve ‘been there done that’. And that’s fine. But it’s also fine to want it to be special, to celebrate properly, and to want to look beautiful in a great dress 🙂

Post # 7
Member
1750 posts
Buzzing bee

@dreamweaver5521: Be as beautiful as your possibly can, its your wedding day. Who cares if it is your second time. Have fun, enjoy your life!

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