(Closed) Etiquette of attending the wedding of a couple that is not invited to yours?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should we attend FI's cousin's wedding?

    Yes, you were invited so they obviously want you there.

    No, you should not attend their wedding if they aren't invited to yours.

    Other (Please explain)

  • Post # 2
    Member
    1111 posts
    Bumble bee

    View original reply
    MrsMeowton:  Weddings are not tit for tat. Go and enjoy yourself! If anybody asks if they are invited to yours (rude btw), say you’re having a much smaller wedding than this and are still working on the guest list. They’ll get the hint.

    Post # 3
    Member
    206 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2015

    I don’t think you should absolutely go unless you wanted to! And I agree with PP 🙂

    Post # 4
    Member
    927 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2011

    It’s not faux pas to attend the wedding of a couple you didn’t invite to your own wedding. If the couple has invited you and you are able to attend, you should. 

    Post # 5
    Member
    369 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: October 2015

    I was in this exact situation with a former co-worker,  old friend.  I didn’t intend to invite him to mine due to the small size of our wedding,  but he invited me to his and was very insistent we come.  My thought was ok,  now you have to come to mine LOL

    Post # 6
    Member
    892 posts
    Busy bee

    some families feel like they have to invite everybody they know, and they are honestly ok with that arrangement. they should also be understanding that not every other family is going to be just like theirs. go ahead and go! if anything, to make your Future Mother-In-Law happy. 

    to assauge your guilt of not inviting them, be sure to give them a good present. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    2848 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    I wouldnt not go to a wedding for this reason… people understand. Besides, if you dont go your probably going to have to give a reason and “were not going becuase they arent invited to ours” sounds kinda dumb. Go and have fun without guilt!

    Post # 8
    Member
    5151 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: June 2014

    Go ahead and enjoy yourself! 

    Post # 9
    Member
    130 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2015

    Some people are in the position that they are able to invite all of their family. We were invited to FI’s cousins wedding (on his dad’s side). They had about 130 people. We went, and we had fun.

    We did not invite them to our wedding which was a little less than a year later. We financially could not afford to invite everyone. Future Mother-In-Law has 6 siblings, and they all have children, and some have grandchildren. We had to draw a line in his family so we could have the wedding that we wanted and could afford. With all of his family, we were at 175. The actual wedding ended up being less than 55 people. 

    Afterwards, on facebook when I posted pictures, I told everyone we were thankful to those who could come and we were glad we could have the small wedding of our dreams. 

    So go if you want to! Weddings are not tit for tat. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    1303 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: Hawksnest Cove Beach St John USVI

    My ILs thought we should invite everyone who had ever invited them to a wedding to our intimate family only wedding. It was a long talk but finally everyone was on the same page. Invite who you want at your wedding and attend the weddings you want!  

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