Ever been disappointed with your birthday…

posted 9 months ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
47188 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I find that the easiest way to have expectations met is to simply lower them. I really don’t feel a need for all that attention on my birthday. After all, all I did was be born. It’s my Mom who deserves the attention and appreciation ( if she were still alive). I really don’t get the need for adult birthday parties.

Next year tell your spouse exactly what you need from them- a gift off your list and their company for the whole evening.

Post # 3
Member
768 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

I’m not a big fan of celebrating my birthday so I guess I’m never disappointed? Haven’t had a birthday party since I was 16 😂

Post # 4
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Scotts ~ Walnut Creek

Can’t relate. Birthdays aren’t a big deal to either of us. As an adult I certainly don’t expect anyone to throw me a party. Even dinner out at a restaurant seems like a pretty nice gesture, at least you were thought of and enjoyed time with loved ones. Instead of comparing your SO to your ex next time I would take the advice above and have a conversation about what you would like for your birthday. Your SO isn’t a mind reader and he did spend all day with you celebrating.

If you need a bunch of attention and a party maybe throw one for yourself next time? Not that hard.

Post # 5
Member
3730 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

I do think its pretty crappy that he left you to hang out with friends on your birthday. Even if he’s not super into birthdays that’s pretty inconsiderate. My husband is definitely not into special occasions or gift giving. His family never was either whereas mine very much is. It sounds like your fiance needs specific instructions about what you would like. I know that’s not quite as romantic, but it’s better than feeling let down.

Post # 7
Member
12097 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

penny1403 :  I think it’s disgraceful that your fiancé went off with his friends like that. I’d be hurt and he’d know about it. 

I certainly don’t need an adult birthday party, but a fiancé finding something better to do on your bday, and a big one no less, ought to be ashamed of himself. I’d be thinking long and hard about whether or not this kind of thing is an isolated instance. 

Post # 9
Member
373 posts
Helper bee

penny1403 :  i would be very unhappy with my fiance if he up and left to go out with his friends on my birthday 

But i remember your username, based off your previous posts , your relationship issues are deep. Ocean deep.

 

Post # 10
Member
265 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Scotts ~ Walnut Creek

 I have got to stop commenting before researching previous threads. This birthday thing is a drop in the bucket of your relationship problems. Good luck

Post # 11
Member
8832 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

  penny1403 :  I thought you broke up? Is this a new guy or did you take the old one back after he pushed you and broke your stuff?

Post # 13
Member
2477 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

penny1403 :  You should have just hung out with one of the celebrities you live by. It probably would have met your expectations more and suited such a well to do person like you. 

Post # 14
Member
2477 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

Hunnibee88 :  Deeper than the deep end of the ocean.

Post # 15
Member
831 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Sorry you had such a bummer of a 40th B-day, Bee!

 

I’ll empathize with you. Birthdays aren’t a big deal to me, but mine was surprisingly disappointing this year. The day before my birthday, my husband asked me what I wanted to do for my birthday. I told him I’d like to go to a hockey game; the local, minor-league team would be playing a home game, so it’d be an inexpensive and fun thing we could do together to get out of the house. Darling Husband agreed and said it’d be an awesome date night, and I assumed he was getting tickets….

But nope! The next day, on my birthday, he gave me some socks and plastic hangers (???), forgot all about the game, and spent the evening watching his TV shows on the couch. The mind boggles over why he had SPECIFICALLY ASKED ME, the DAY BEFORE, what I wanted to do for my birthday, just to ignore it. Ah well. The male mind is a mysterious place sometimes. 

 

PS: The silver lining? For the rest of our lives, if he ever gets disappointed in whatever I give him for his birthday, I’m going to be able to say, “At least I got you something better than socks and plastic hangers!” That kind of ammunition has got to count for something, right?! (*I kid, I kid.*)

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