(Closed) Ever feel like your wedding is too cheap????

posted 8 years ago in Money
Post # 3
101 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Okay, darlin’, I’m in your shoes, and I had a friend in your shoes, too. There’s only one thing to do. Roll with it. 

This is what I mean: don’t try to make the wedding any more sophisticated than the budget is going to permit. If you’re going to do a casual barbecue, do a casual barbecue and make it the best you can. Maybe you can get printed paper napkins and clear plastic cups with your initials or a little logo on them. Search around for the best plastic tablecloths you can find – there are lots of whimsical ones that go far beyond solid colors or red-and-white-gingham. The internet is full of great stuff. Once you let go of linen, you can make the best of what you’ll be able to get. 

When you talk to people, try to sound excited. Say you’re not a formal bride, that you just wanted a big old backyard party – a casual and warm affair. You can make this all seem like it’s on purpose, instead of something created by a limitation. Don’t try to “make up for” the fact that it’s a barbecue by having fancy invitations; again, just roll with what you have. I’m not saying that you should have kitschy or crappy invitations, but go with something plain and not done up with curliques – you know what I mean. 

The wedding industry is the one that tries to make you believe that this day matters tens of thousands of dollars worth. It doesn’t. Life is long. 

My friend Olivia got pregnant and married her fiance – I’m not kidding – nine months along and barefoot on the front steps of her house. She was from a very wealthy family in one o the richest parts of the country, but they were so furious about her getting married out of wedlock they wouldn’t give her a penny. We all just gathered around when it was time for vows. There was homemade food on a table in the living room, beer in an ice bucket, clear plastic plates and cutlery, and an iPod in an iPod dock. Nobody has every forgotten this wedding; it was so much fun.

Was it inexpensive? Yes, everyone could tell. Nobody cared. The guests were taken care of with good food and drinks, so what could they complain about? Was it cheap? No. Cheap is when you try to fake it. And Olivia has a beautiful life now, with three gorgeous children and her sweet husband, and that’s the reality of her life – her marriage, not the one day where it started.

I don’t mean to be unsympathetic. My reception hall is ugly and institutional looking. Eight thousand dollars worth of flowers and labor would make it look absolutely amazing. But I’m looking at the kind of budget where I bought a $70 J. Crew wedding dress with a broken strap off of eBay. And I’m trying to let it go. I breathe in…I breathe out. I’m not rich. People who are coming to this wedding probably already know that, so this should be no shocker. Don’t listen to negativity from yourself or from anyone else. Get a budget from your mom, but insist on what you want within that budget, and good luck. 


Post # 4
134 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I’m gonna blow some life in to this one…

I truly feel our wedding is gonna be cheap…and i’m hating it. We can’t afford a fancy venue or a 5 course sit down dinner…we’re having a foodtruck with fries and burgers, we have beer and wine, we have plastic everything and the room looks AWFULL! We can’t afforrd to throw in truckloads of fresh flowers…I just worry that people are gonna be like…WELL….that was…interesting, instead off awesome / fun / romantic..

I’m trying to get over it…and just enjoy the day but I just never imagined the day to be like it’s about to be…


@Lapeaudesoie:  I’m not rich. People who are coming to this wedding probably already know that, so this should be no shocker

I keep trying to tell myself this…I just needed to vent I guess…

Post # 5
12247 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Dutchbee:  I also had a (nearly) painfully cheap wedding. It cost 4k for the whole shebang. We had a luncheon with no dancing. It was seriously 2 hours long!

What saved it for us was spending the 1k on renting a party bus and taking our 20 closest friends out dancing with us after! We paid for booze, and we all had SO much fun!

Post # 6
3 posts
  • Wedding: August 2014

family and friends is waht it is all about…having a great time not the money

Post # 7
2300 posts
Buzzing bee

I thought our budget would be enough, but when I see what other people are spending I realize I maybe outta luck.  I dont want grand, but I would like nice. I think we are seriously gonna have to cut some corners here, and its upsetting me.

I’m no fairy princess and I don’t expect the best of everything, but I would like something nice.

It’s also hard when(and I dont mean this to you OP) but my friends at work are having weddings and their father’s are paying for it and they are not setting limits. My father is very well off, but doesn’t intend on helping us at all. Its a bitter pill to swallow. Although it does give us the freedom to do what we want, I know we wont have as nice a ceremony as I wish.

Post # 8
730 posts
Busy bee

I know this is old, but geez. I couldn’t believe what i was reading… “my parents are paying for the wedding but they’re being so cheap, waaaah, I’m too old to let my mom have so much control, boo hoo.” Seriously? Pay for it yourself then! 

Post # 9
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

Sorry I just saw this was two years ago…


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