(Closed) Ever had people tell you that they prefer you with extra weight………….?

posted 5 years ago in Fitness
Post # 31
9532 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2016

barnes66:  Hey,

I already posted, but I read a bit more about what you said–coworkers saying this when you weight more and that when you weighed less and all of it upsetting you. You gotta learn to just say a quiet little “fuck you too” in your head and ignore it all–in the end no one else sshould be deciding what the right weight is for you.  Allowing others to affect how you feel about your own body leads to an endless, unhappy, chase because–as you very well know–there will always be someone with something mean to say.  We have to figure out for ourselves what our comfortable weight ranges are, and ignore anyone who says otherwise.

Post # 33
194 posts
Blushing bee

I think you look better in the “after” photos! About a year and a half ago, I took a 6-week, 4x/wk bootcamp and went from a size 6 to 2. I got so many backhanded compliments about how “lucky” I was that I could eat anything and be so tiny; that I needed to “eat a cheeseburger”; and that I was also a “skinny bitch”. It may sound conceited, but women that lack the motivation to commit to a fitness regimen and eating plan lash out at those who can. Jealousy is a funny thing. Those were the most difficult 6 weeks of my life, but it showed me that it could be done if I put my mind to it. Keep your head high and ignore the haters! They’re just jealous that you are bikini-ready 365 days a year!

Post # 34
3242 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I know that since I’ve put on weight, women like me better. Because I used to have a perfect body. And now I have cellulite and a paunch.  Why we like it when others are less I have no idea. Jealousy and bitterness.  DH loves me this size though. Gone from flat chested to a healthy looking C cup. He feels like he has won the lottery!  Men! I prefer me toned but I’m injured so I can’t work out.  I think you look hot.  Do what makes you feel better!

Post # 35
1433 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

To the original question… Yes!

Agree it’s about how you feel in yourself. Interestingly – I did see a photo of myself from about 7 years ago and actually thought I did look too thin – so maybe the people who said it had a point! Certainly not that skinny these days! 

Post # 36
9544 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2013

Everyone has personal preferences. Populat culture in the US generally lends itself toward thinking skinnier is better. But there are plenty of people out there who prefer rounder body types. And that’s all okay. Apparently your co-worker’s preference is different than yours. And that’s okay too. But she should have been polite and kept her mouth shut. If you’re more comfortable smaller, then go with that. Yes, there will be some people out there who woudl find you more attractive with a bit more weight but who cares? There’s plenty of people who would prefer you at your skinnier weight. And ultimately, that’s where you’re more comfortable, so don’t let it get to you. 

Post # 37
3221 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

I think you look adorable in either size, which is good. It means you don’t have to focus on weight, you can focus on how you feel and healthiness. I think the two pictures you posted looked better when you were larger, but that’s probably in part due to the fit of the clothes.  Most people aren’t as attractive when their clothes are three sizes too big! 😉

Post # 38
729 posts
Busy bee

I think you look good both ways, actually. I wouldn’t think too much about the comment. People are sensitive about weight (their own AND other people’s) and they end up saying awkward things. I think it’s mostly about them, not you. It sounds like this lady’s comment was just conversational filler and she didn’t want to say you looked bad before you lost weight, but she didn’t know what else to say.

I used to have this friend who hated/obsessed over her body and thought she was fat (she wasn’t) and one day we found old pictures from the beach in my glove compartment and I made a passing comment about how skinny I used to be and she went on and on about how I “looked sick” and was “too skinny” in those pictures. When those pics were taken I was 21, had recently gotten into cycling, and ate whatever I wanted. I was definitely not sick and I looked fine! I think she was 1) projecting her own insecurities and 2) trying to make me feel better about having gained weight, even though I didn’t feel bad about it in the first place. But it was kind of odd to have my past self be insulted like that especially when I got the sense that she didn’t even believe it herself. Long story short, people have issues!

Post # 39
3090 posts
Sugar bee

I think I look better bigger but I struggle to keep weight on. I think I look way too skinny at 5’7″ and 140.

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