Post # 1
I have a friend who I’ve been friends with for years who I’ve always thought I would have a bridesmaid. We don’t talk or get to see one another very often but when we do, nothing ever changes. We just get along really well.
A couple years ago, she went through some major relationship issues/other tough issues in her life and we grew pretty close through that. She told me she appreciated me being there for her and definitely wanted me as a bridesmaid whenever she got married. She is now getting married in June, and I’m not a bridesmaid ..which is completely fine with me! Since meeting her fiance, she has met several good friends through him. She also has sisters, several childhood friends, close roommates, cousins, etc. And I moved 4 hours away for a job about a year ago, so we rarely get to see one another.
I am not hurt by this whatsoever. I definitely understand. And I’m incredibly happy for her.
But would it be awkward for her if I still asked her to be a bridesmaid? I just wouldn’t want her to feel bad about it.
I really hope this doesn’t sound too juvenile! Also .. my possible engagement isn’t for months and months ..just thinking about things!
Post # 3
I don’t think asking people to be bridesmaids needs to be reciprocated. Particularly if you’re not bothered by it, I wouldn’t worry about it 🙂
Post # 4
Yup- my cousin was in mine. I was hurt to not be her bridesmaid- but she was still in mine. I also had my bff from HS in our wedding- we had a falling out in college and were not friends when she got married…. so glad that ended and she was able to be in mine!
Post # 5
I asked a girl I know to be my maid of honor even though she didn’t even invite me to her wedding a few years back.
I’m fine with that, a few years back we’d only met twice before but over the years we have become closer and we’ve become pretty close since I asked her to be my M.O.H so I am glad with the way things worked out.
She was so happy when I asked and has been a huge help with wedding planning. It is good to have someone by your side who has gotten married before, she will be very helpful to you.
Post # 6
@JoJoDahling: That’s very understandable since you didn’t know one another well before!
Post # 7
My Maid/Matron of Honor has 3 sisters so I know for a fact I will not be a bridesmaid in her wedding lol. I think it’s totally fine.
Post # 8
My best friend since highschool did that too.. She got engaged a couple of months before I did and since she knew I was engaged too, she began to be all “bitchy” about the whole wedding stuff.. She didn’t want to tell me ANYTHING about her wedding, and I was so excited I was telling her everything about mine (cuz I wanted to share that special moment with her) but even tho she didn’t chose me as a bridesmaid, I will choose her… 🙂
Post # 9
- Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort
Yeah. It’s not a do ut des situation. If you want her in your wedding, ask. I’ve been matron of honor for someone I almost didn’t even invite to my first wedding… relationships change and different people have different sized bridal parties and a different number of close friends.
Post # 10
Yep. One of the first people I asked to be a bridesmaid did not ask me to be a bridesmaid. It wasn’t awkward for either one of us. Everyone’s wedding is different and has unique circumstances and choices to make. If you want her to be by your side, most definitely ask her!
Post # 11
this hasn’t happened to me, but none of my close friends/cousins have gotten married, so the opportunity hasn’t really presented itself. my best friend (who’s a bridesmaid in my wedding) was engaged for a while and asked me to be a bridesmaid, but they ended up splitting up. and another bridesmaid of mine has always talked about having me be bridesmaid for her. she ended up having a very last minute civil ceremony and i wasn’t even there for it, but she still says she wants me to be a bridesmaid for her “real” wedding, so we shall see.
Post # 12
None of my BMs are having me in their WPs. My cousin is already married (and didn’t), my Maid/Matron of Honor and one Bridesmaid or Best Man (both bffs) are engaged and not really planning, my 4th Bridesmaid or Best Man isn’t dating anyone (although if she does get married, she may ask me), and the last is my 15 year old Future Sister-In-Law, who may choose me in several years.