Post # 31
jazandlo : From skimming the responses, everyone seems to be saying that they wouldn’t travel four hours for an engagement party–but that doesn’t seem to be the main issue. It’s that they all RSVP’d yes and then all turned around and say no. So, if you aren’t going to travel four hours for a party you don’t deem as important, don’t. But do not say you’ll attend and then back out last minute.
Honestly, OP, I don’t know what I would do, but I’d hate to have twenty-thirty people dip out of my wedding last minute and stick me with the bill.
Post # 32
So, I, like other pp’s am wondering 1) why EVERYONE suddenly changed their tune, because that’s just a really weird trend and while it could be an anomaly, it’s just odd.. and 2) why you’re so upset that people simply stated that they wouldn’t travel for an engagement party that is 6 months before your wedding. Idk when you got engaged but it seems late in the planning process for this party (or rather, it seems close to your wedding date…I’m assuming people probably just had to pick one or the other, and chose your wedding). ??
ANYWAYYYY yes, it sucks that they all RSVP’d yes and now have all declined. I don’t really know if there’s anything you can do. You don’t really want to call them (again) and now basically try to convince them to come–I mean, they’re adults. They know whether they can come or not.
As far as his parents, that’s a little more surprising to me, but, if they’re also having to take time/travel for the wedding which is in 6 months (especially since you said his dad, right, is just starting a new job?), I can understand. It’s not “the” event, it’s a party.
Also, I guarantee that, assuming nothing crazy happened that made everyone decide not to come, people probably thought “oh I’ll have to decline but they won’t notice, I’m sure everyone else will be there.” No one realized that every single person on his side had something come up.
Just try to enjoy the party with the guests that will be there, and make sure your Fiance is engaged throughout the party. Try to seat people (if you’re serving dinner) in a way that mixes everyone, vs his and hers so it doesn’t look so one-sided. Things like that.