(Closed) Everyone has a right to do their wedding their way, but I’m a little bummed…

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
542 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Why dont you call him/her to catch up and just breifly ask “hey hows the wedding planning going” and see what they say

Post # 5
1569 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 1996

I would probably be bummed too, but it’s possible that something’s going on that could be unexpected. They could have gone sans Save-The-Date Cards, are late getting invitations out, and/or your invitation could have gotten lost in the mail (this does happen). Or the wedding got postponed – or, of course, you could be right that they’re just having a very small wedding. Even in that case though, it would have been polite of him when you asked if his wedding was still in October to say something about it being just for close family, so you wouldn’t be waiting for an invitation. I agree with JessicaL, ask him how the planning is going.

Post # 7
1518 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I have a friend who messaged me about my address to invite me to the wedding and i never got anything from them about it! Im assuming they had cut the guest list or something.. but it is a bummer and kinda rude i think. There wedding is this next weekend and they came to ours at the beginning of september.

 If he is changing the subject maybe he feels bad about not being able to include you.. but if ya’ll are good friends then i would ask him. Tell him you understand that they are doing things  their way and ya it is kind of a bummer but that you were just curious about what was going on.. small wedding, pushing it back what ever the case may be. 

Post # 8
459 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

I’ve been on the other side of this–I am having a very small, 35-person wedding. I had a friend send me a “sooo, it’s almost October, am I invited to your wedding? Wanted to make sure the invitation didn’t get lost in the mail” email. If I were having a standard-sized wedding she would have been invited, but for a wedding this small she is not.

I would say that it doesn’t hurt to ask. You’ll feel better when you know, and if he did not invite you because his wedding will be very small, he probably won’t mind telling you. I personally did not mind being asked, because I knew that my wedding was smaller than average and that some people would have expectations about getting an invitation.

And I actually did end up sending an invitation to the wrong address that got lost in the mail! It sounds like that is not the case here since he is being evasive about talking about the wedding, but you do never know.

Post # 9
16191 posts
Honey Beekeeper

Aww I feel for you, hun. I don’t blame you for being upset…they are your close friends! Do you have any mutual friends you could talk to in order to see if the date’s still set for October?

Post # 11
8738 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

@LadyJDAG: I’m sorry you won’t be able to go, but I’m glad you got an answer. You can always ask to see pictures, etc. He probably didn’t know how to breach the subject with you either because it is a sensitive topic.


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