Post # 1
Hi Bee’s –
This may be a rant, I’m not sure yet. I’m SO sick of everyone I know posting this on to their facebook or instagram.
To me it’s a direct insult to anyone who is engaged. So, are you saying that since I’m getting married I’m giving up my dreams of building a career? Sure, I shouldn’t care, but I do. These are my colleagues, I want them to respect that fact that I have a “family” yes I will have a husband, one day children, and a career. No you don’t have to give your life up to get married.
What do you think when you see these post?
Post # 3
i think it is just a way to deflect the pain of not being married and starting a family yet.
Post # 5
Just recently some girl on my fb posted something about “Being 30 and unmarried? Sounds good to me!” but she’s the one who’s always a bridesmaid and…you know.
Post # 6
Yep. It’s a shame there’s a national law against having a career once you get married!
Wait, there’s no such law? Well, next you’re going to tell me I can still travel and grow as a person when I’m married!
WHAT! What do you MEAN that life doesn’t end and stagnate when you get married and start a family? BLASPHEMY!
Post # 7
Why do you care so much about some silly ecard or whatever they’re called? Do your own thing and don’t worry what others think. And I doubt they are jealous, as is the default assumption. Believe it or not, career is more important than babies for some people.
Post # 8
Plus playing the devil’s advocate here, now is the time (engagement season and all) for your colleagues to be seeing a lot of engagement announcements with wedding Save-The-Date Cards. If they are not settled in that part of their life yet, they may be feeling left out/insecure.
Post # 9
@Fluffmallow: It’s an internal struggle as a person not to care, much easier said than done. I DO know that to some people having a career is more important, as someone who works in the child abuse field, I strongly appreciate people who KNOW they don’t want to have children. However, it’s disrespectful to people who do want them to assume that we cannot have both.
Post # 10
@Meant2Bee: I can see the point with the babies, given that most of the times the woman has to put her career on hold at least some time during the first years. But the wedding, I don’t get it ? It’s just a day, and it changes nothing to your day to day routine ?
Post # 11
This doesn’t offend me at all, maybe it’s just me, but I wouldn’t assume the person posting it was saying that because I’m married with a kid doesn’t mean I don’t have a good career, just that they are currently more focused on that then being engaged/married.
Post # 12
Post # 13
Am I missing something? Can engaged/married people not have successful careers? Kind of a silly ecard IMO. Someone just trying to rationalize why they are doing things differently than the majority of other people at that point in their lives.
Post # 14
let’s all remember that if someone has an opinion that we perceive as an insult, the only possible explanation is that they are jealous.
Post # 15
@Fluffmallow: +1 I was thinking it but didnt say it. There are those e-cards about EVERYTHING and many can be offensive if you let them. I dont let them bother me at all.
Post # 16
- Wedding: August 2013 - An amazing non-profit retreat
@annifer: I was hunting for the “like” button for that one.
It’s just to each their own. I kinda sorta gave up my career goals for marriage *backs away slowly* BUT in my defense, if I gave them up, I couldn’t have wanted it that badly in the first place.