Everyone is waiting for me to get pregnant.

posted 4 months ago in Family
Post # 16
Member
313 posts
Helper bee

Same here and it sucks. We’ve been trying too since November and now instead of asking when is baby my mom sends me fertility / infertility information. Ugh. Like every time we talk she brings it up. It’s super annoying. 

Post # 17
Member
159 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I totally support not telling your parents till you are ready to tell everyone. Once my Mother-In-Law knew I was pregnant she pushed us to tell other family memebers before I was ready. Everything turned out great and my son is healthy and happy at 16 months, but if anything had gone wrornf I would have really resented afterwards sharing with so many people so soon.

 

rainbowduckie :  

Post # 18
Member
7915 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

rainbowduckie :  

100% I am not telling anyone about TTC. I don’t even plan on telling our parents when we get pregnant until we are out of the woods with the first trimester.

Absolutely , nobody’s business  at all but yours and his. If you can, try replying with nothing more than an expressionless face ( well,  maybe  a wintery smile) and a ” mmn yes ,well   ….” and change of  subject .

We could not have children  and I do wish  I had been less accomodating in my responses  in the early years when it was unsure . I remember several quite  affronted faces when I eventually gave an angry and honest response .

I do understand  their desire for grandchildren  etc   – but the pain of being asked,  after yet  another unwanted period …

 I never, ever ask young women about their babymaking plans etc.   

 

Post # 19
Member
1568 posts
Bumble bee

Yep my mum is even planning her work schedule and wanting to take time off to help with baby. Which is not even close to being conceived yet. Pressure much? Everyone watches me like a hawk to see if I’m putting on weight or drinking alcohol.

Post # 21
Member
1884 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

Where I live it’s the norm to start trying as soon as you get married. Hubby and I agreed to wait a year. So we’ve had all sort of comments. We just ignored them or turned them into jokes. Now I am pregnant (still early days) and I try and look as unpregnant as possible when seeing people because I know as soon as there’s a bump it’ll be the talk of the town.

On the other hand I’ve told my parents (who live in a different  country ) and I think they were shocked we started trying already. They were married for 8 years before having my oldest brother.

Post # 22
Member
629 posts
Busy bee

You could lie and tell everyone you’re waiting another year or so to try for children, then announce the pregnancy when your doctor tells you it’s safe to do so. This may give you a little peace from unsolicited advice, in the meantime, while you’re trying to conceive. Goodness. I feel for you, Bee! Hang in there. 

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