(Closed) Everyone wants to be a bridesmaid AKA I’m a jerk.

posted 7 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
Member
46404 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Don’t let these people make their problem your problem. Expecting to be a bridemaid or complaining about not being selected are both inappropriate.

You can’t ask everyone in your life to be in your wedding party.

Post # 4
Member
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

I would try to include your Future Sister-In-Law in some way, but NOT as a bridesmaid… you’re under no obligation to have people you barely know standing by you.

But, maybe she could do a reading or be a lady usher or something like that.

But the “friends” are being rude. If you have to say something I would do a non-apology (“I’m sorry your feelings are hurt, I made the best decision I could”) but otherwise just ignore them.

Post # 5
Member
964 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

It’s your day and you should be able to have it your way:-)

Post # 7
Member
319 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2012

@vlbee: Hmmm… Does she have any sort of special skills or talents that could be featured? e.g I have a friend who is a classically trained vocalist and local performer, he’s doing a song at the reception (we have a string quartet that will be backing him).

You could put a special thank you to her for lending you her beautiful children in the program… if it’s heartfelt I’m sure she’d appreciate it.

Would she like to excort your Future Mother-In-Law to her seat? Again, not traditionally a lady’s job, but it might make her feel more involved.

Or, are you having a spa day or anything with the bridal party? Maybe just including her in the fun “lead-up” things will make her feel more included. I totally sympathize with her feeling left out, but she should still understand why you wouldn’t be psyched about someone you barely know as a bridesmaid.

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