(Closed) Ex bf just married the woman he cheated on me with

posted 5 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
11752 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I think you should stay out of it, cut all (if any) communication and move on with your life and leave him behind.

Post # 4
Member
1719 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

You should cut off all contact with him.  i.e. change your number.  He is toxic and unhealthy.  And, I wouldn’t tell her because at this point, nothing good can come from that.

 

Post # 5
Member
691 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Stay out of it and move on. Awful as it is, he made his choice.

Post # 6
Member
757 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Yeah he sounds like an awful person. You should cut him off completely and not think about him ever again. This is her problem now, and you getting involved would only make it worse.

Post # 7
Member
474 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Move on.  Cut all ties with him. 

My Ex-husband cheated on me with someone he was working with.  He left me and was with “P”.  He then cheated on “P” with ANOTHER co-worker “S”.  He ended up marrying “S”, who was just plain dumb considering she knew he cheated on me and “P”.  And guess what ???  He has cheated on “S” !  I know.  Surprise.  

A tiger never changes it stripes.

Post # 8
Member
2759 posts
Sugar bee

He’s married now. Anything further with him makes you equally a cheater. Cut off contact, get into some therapy to work through all of this, and move on.

Post # 10
Member
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

You need to walk away from it and move on with your life.  Don’t ever answer his calls or texts…. quit him cold turkey!

Post # 11
Member
3568 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

No don’t tell her.  Eventually karma will come around and bite him in the A$$.  Just be glad you didn’t end up marrying a cheating jerk like that and move on to bigger and better things!!

The best thing you can do is to cut off communication with him.  If he ever confronts you about it in person, just tell him he’s married and you want nothing to do with him. Eventually it will be easier to move on.

I had a similiar experience about 8 years ago, ex-fiance cheated with a girl we both knew, said it was a “one time thing”, we broke up, tried to “work things out”, during this time we had gotten into an arguement on the phone about some things and I decided to drive over to his house to talk it out.  When I got there, her car was there.  The next day I went back and gave him my engagement ring back.  For about a month or so he kept calling and trying to tell me that he wanted to work things out.  Eventually, he finally quit trying to get back with me, but would still contact me about once a week to “see how I was doing.”  

Fast forward about a year later, he’s dating her, but still calling to me on occasion triyng to be friends.  He was in complete denial that he’d ever cheated on me with her, and tried to pull the “we were on a break” thing, while we weren’t.  About 3 weeks before their wedding, he called to tell me his grandfather had passed.  She saw this in his phone, took my number and started calling threatening me and telling me that she was worried I was going to try to get him back.  By this point I was with my now Fiance, and had completely moved on from this.  I contacted him and told him to never call/text me again and to get his girl in check because I was tired of her calling me and harrassing me too.  

After they got married, he found out she cheated and they got divorced…I found this out because he called me out of the blue one day apologizing for his actions and how he hurt me.  I may be a horrible person, but I secretly laughed inside over his failed marriage…karma is a B*tch! 

Anyway, my point being is that while I was in the relationship with this guy, I thought I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him.  I thought our relationship was great. It wasn’t until I got out that I could sit back and look at how messed up our relationship had become, we had grown up and grown apart and it wasn’t until I started dating my now Fiance that I realized how things should be. We’ve been together for almost 7 years, and I couldn’t be happier!

Post # 12
Member
691 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Don’t use your stuff or money to keep him interacting with you. Cut your losses.  If its big stuff hire a lawyer to handle it. 

Post # 14
Member
9674 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@Confuscious10:   I’m so sorry you’re hurting like this.  Please just cut your losses with this man and move on.  I agree with the suggestions from PP’s to get some counseling for yourself.  This relationship with him is highly toxic and unhealthy for you.

He is not the right one for you.  He’s a cheater, an abuser and a liar.  He’ll never treat you right.  You need to face the fact that he used you.

I’m so sorry!  But please, move on.  You deserve to find a man who will never hurt you or treat you so poorly.  You deserve true love.  That man does not love you.

I wish you all the best!

Post # 14
Member
2 posts
Wannabee

i know it’s been 3 years, but i just read this.

you said “I finally walked away with my 2nd and felt like he rescued me from all my hurt and pain that I put up with for years” – so what you did is you didnt break up with your boy, but went behind his back with this other dude that “saved you”. as in, you didnt have the courage to walk away by yourself and only then meet another guy, but you stayed in the abusive relationship (why, i dont know) and waited for some external rescue. that wasnt fair from a relationship’s point of view – you should have walked away first and only then meet that prince charming…that turned out not to be so charming after all…

you went double, played both sides…and then your new boyfriend went off with another girl (while still with you). he did to you what u did to your ex. if u ask me, that’s karma. i see someone commented that dont woory, karma will take care of your new cheating bf, but i think karma already happened, and it took care of you…paid you back with what u did to your ex.

Post # 15
Member
299 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2017

lancelot82:  That sentence doesn’t have to mean she cheated. It could mean he helped her get over her pain after she left the other guy. Btw what’s the point of ressurecting a two year old thread and judging someone when they won’t even see it? The last time she was on the Bee was two years ago. 

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