Ex-fiancee's Mom wants loan paid back ASAP. Ughhh.

posted 6 months ago in Emotional
Post # 32
Member
1435 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

sallyloves90 :  interesting . I would keep my payments the same. She can’t change the terms without going to court and she won’t spend money on that to get $1400 back quickly.  

Post # 33
Member
800 posts
Busy bee

sallyloves90 :  Good response! 

 

I would have been a more direct like “I’m not sure why you’re blaming me for our relationship ending when your daughter cheated on me, but I will continue to demonstrate that I am a woman of character by repaying your generous loan on the schedule we originally agreed upon. Your daughter’s unfaithfulness has no bearing on my ability to fulfill the terms of this loan.” 

 

Don’t worry about her suing you, by the time she got a court date you’d have already paid the loan off since you have less than 3 Months to go…..and furthermore, the lawsuit would get tossed out by any judge as frivolous considering you are not in breach of contract as you’ve been making the monthly payments you two agreed upon.

 

 

Post # 34
Member
800 posts
Busy bee

j_jaye :  But the ex Future Mother-In-Law cannot call in the loan ASAP. It’s the same as your car note or mortgage. If you agree to pay $500/mo for 5 years to buy a car and you’ve been making timely payments in full, your creditor cannot just send you a letter saying, “never mind our agreement, you owe $12k tomorrow or we’re repossessing your car.” 

 

A judge would look at this situation the same way. OP is not in default of the loan terms, even if they were informally agreed upon. Ex Future Mother-In-Law can want the money yesterday but has no legal right to pursue getting it faster than the loan terms.

Post # 35
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2020 - City, State

I had an ex-roommate leave atthe drop of a hat, stranding me with her rent and bills, and then sued me for the deposit she’d lent me. I didn’t think I owed it to her after I paid all her rent and bills when she skipped town for no good reason, but I told her I’d pay her back anyway, over the same time period we’d initially agreed upon. That wasn’t good enough for her, so she took me to court, the judge decided I only owed her 14% of what she asked for, and I ended up not being able to pay it till nearly two and a half years later.

The lesson is:

-get ALL agreements in writing in the future

-even if she sued you for the 1400 she can’t rush your ability to repay her, and it’s not like you’re trying to salvage the relationship at this point

-while there may be moments of stress, everything is gonna be okay

Hope this goes well for you!

Post # 36
Member
564 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2018 - City, State

sallyloves90 :  Your exFMIL doesn’t need to get into the dirty details about why your relationship ended; she probably wouldn’t believe you anyway. She’s invested in protecting her daughter and you are just the ex that broke her heart. Rise above! Pay her back on the agreed-upon timeline, wipe her from your brain, and never speak to her again. Just another memory casualty of your ended relationship.

Post # 38
Member
684 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

sallyloves90 :  ugh what?? I am so thrown off by all these responses saying they don’t blame your ex’s mom for wanting the money back sooner. You and her mom came up with an agreement for the payment (which you have been generous in paying her back in a timely manner) why should you all of a sudden be punished and penalized because of a mistake that her daughter made that led to the break up. That was absolutely no fault of your own. It would be completely different if you were the one who cheated on her daughter but if anything her mom should have more sympathy since her daughter was the cheating ass in this situation. 

Post # 39
Member
570 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2007 - City, State

sallyloves90 :  DID SHE SERIOUSLY JUST BLAME YOU FOR HER DAUGHTER CHEATING ON YOU? Good riddance to these toxic assholes. 

Post # 40
Member
1254 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2018 - -

Wow. She is a fucking loser. I would see if anyone could loan me money just so I could be done with the both of them FOREVER. Fucking twisted people.

Post # 41
Member
718 posts
Busy bee

You’re right, fuck them both. Pay the mom back as you were before and wash your hands of them both.

Post # 42
Member
248 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2020

What a super disgusting response!!  Ugh. Good riddance to these people. 

Post # 43
Member
682 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

Just read your update… Please send the final payment to her in cash. A stack of $1s with “FUCK YOU” written in bright red marker on each one.

So sorry you’re going through all of this 🙁 Hugs to you, Bee!

Post # 44
Member
1030 posts
Bumble bee

After that response, I would be going to the bank, cashing out $500 a month in penny rolls, unrolling the pennies and submitting them as her payment in buckets for the next 3 payments. All recorded from start to finish so it would be proven amounts of money.  And, she’d either have to sit and roll each one to take to a bank or go to a coin counting machine that paid her back less for rolling them.

Post # 45
Member
2465 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: NJ

Whether your contract was verbal or written, if you are paying $500 a month and there is only $1400 left, just keep to the schedule. 

She cannot amend the contract all by herself. At this rate it will be over before she can get the paperwork together and a court date in small-claims court, and she would lose anyway, if you are keeping to the terms of the original contract. 

Just do so.

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