(Closed) Excited to be engaged but underwhelmed by the proposal…

posted 10 years ago in Proposals
Post # 17
Member
409 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I was really underwhelmed with my proposal too.  He did it at a hockey game and even though the guy told him when it would pop up so he would be ready, he wasn’t.  He thought they were going to announce it.  They also had shown a proposal already, then a birthday message, and THEN his proposal, so even though I had been 99% sure it was happening that day, as soon as the birthday message came up I was sad because I didn’t think it was going to happen.  There was no speech, and I even had to tell him that he needed to put the ring on my finger.  We were both kind of disappointed with how it happened, so he re-did it later, but again, no speech.  It took me until the next morning to be okay with how it all went, realizing had it been a huge romantic gesture (it kind of was, he put it up for the whole hockey arena to see) that went perfectly, it wouldn’t have been ‘us’

Post # 18
Member
608 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My Fiance did the same thing.  No big speech.  I turned around and he was on one knee and blurted out “will you marry me”  I think he was a little disapointed that I didn’t cry but I said “how would I have had any time to cry”  I was a bit underwhelmed by his words but I will say that with time I have come to love and appreciate our engagement more and more.  My fiance is not a speech giver and its so like him to just blurt it out with few words and since he is my love its perfect because he was him.   So give it some time, you might gain a new perspective

Post # 19
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Some guys just stink at the whole, grand gesture thing, don’t they? Mine wasn’t even going to ask me! He just handed me the box. I told he needed to ask the question that went with it and he said, would you think about marrying me? Seriously? Not romantic! But, it’s the symbol that the symbol represents and that’s what I had to tell myself! Are you going to post a picture of your new ring? Congrats!

Post # 20
Member
1126 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

My Fiance proposed at home in our house (which I was happy about, as I didn’t want any kind of public gesture).  I was a little disappointed that he didn’t make a speech or anything, as he isn’t much for romantic language and I thought this might be my chance to hear something.  But the proposal was a total surprise, and I’ve realized over the years that my man’s actions do his talking for him, so the effort he put into finding the perfect ring and proposing conveyed enough.

I am going to try to get him to put personal touches into his vow though!

Post # 21
Member
4 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@gr8tlexi:

That is still pretty sweet.First morning in the new house..and FINALLY getting your ring!

I think you feel a little underwhelmed because you saw the ring before.I almost felt that way too.My FH asked me if i’d marry him when we were drunk in california.No ring or anything serious.but right around thankgiving we started looking at rings online together so he could see what style i wanted…i got excited.looked thru a million..narrowed it down to a few…and then heard nothing.christmas came…nothing.I thought he ordered it…then got secretly disappointed..i thought nope..its not gonna happen.

Then I get home from a horrible 12 hour work day a few days after xmas…were sitting around talking..and he starts talking about the ring thing again..and marriage..and asks why i want to marry him and always be with him….I tell him.he looks teary eyed…and im not expecting anything still.. then he says…”would you like your engagement ring now”..and i was like..theres no way he got it..but then he left the room..came back with a little box and sat next to me..he was really tearing up…and then told me to open the box…and there it was..my ring.He was a bit bummed because the one we liked was sold out..and kept saying we can exchange it…He was just super emotional.and i knew this moment was huge for him.turns out he was trying to do it on xmas…but it the expedite shipping he paid extra for..failed.lol.

Its not how i dreamed it would be..no one knee..jaws popping out of the water fireworks..but to me..looking back at that moment..totally perfect.and the ring..hell no im not exchanging it!!its perfect.I wouldn’t change any of it.Even though i saw this ring before…and did almost feel underwhelmed..totally not at all now.

and you can always look back at that moment..and your house..and know that the first morning there…he gave you the ring..and here you are with your wedding to plan!!congrats!and best wishes to you!!

 

Post # 22
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee

The only words of advice I have is to look over some proposal stories of some of the other ladies on here and you’ll see that when it came down to it, most of them can’t even remember what their Fiance said if he said more than “will you marry me?”

Just enjoy basking in the newly engaged glow ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 23
Member
6350 posts
Bee Keeper

Fiance gave it to me right when I got home from work. He had worked the night before so he was sleeping when I got home. I woke him up to say hi and he like immediately blurted out “I got your ring. Let’s get married.”

He promises that he’ll still do a “real proposal” but that was in August so…

Post # 24
Member
10846 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Read my proposal, feel better about yours ๐Ÿ˜‰ Congrats on the new house and the engagement! You have many more years of memories to build, don’t stress about this one too much, his heart was in the right place ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 25
Member
6350 posts
Bee Keeper

View original reply
@bakerella: haha your proposal was one of the first things I ever read on here. It just sounds so much like my grandpa that it just warms my heart.

Post # 26
Member
1955 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010 - Tannery Pond at the Darrow School

I’m sorry, I think I’d feel very similarly to you if I was in that situation!

But it is super-exciting to be engaged, I think you just have to focus on that and then starting thinking about the wedding (which will hopefully make up for the anti-climactic proposal!)

PS- Show us your ring!! ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 27
Member
10846 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

View original reply
@SoontobeMrsA: Awwww! That’s so sweet! It still makes me giggle, but I know what the OP was saying about wanting a very romantic one-of-a-kind type proposal. I’m sad I missed out on the romance part, but I did get the one-of-a-kind ๐Ÿ˜‰

Post # 28
Member
458 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

What he did was really sweet. It sounds so cute.  It kind of seems like you ruined it for yourself a little when you kept asking him and pouting about it. He was bound to give in to make you happy.

Post # 29
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

When my Fiance first proposed I was only confused cos he didn’t say anything, or get down on one knee, I thought he was being silly. 5 months later he tried again, this time got down on one knee (for less than half a second!) but still didn’t say anything romantic like I was hoping for. And then we spent the next 30mins driving round looking for a gas station, woo. Oh I so know what you mean with the pouting, I was an expert for those 5 months before the “real” proposal finally came :-p

Post # 31
Member
4801 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Haha at least he tried to do it at a sentimental point in time, after your first night in your new house.  My uncle proposed to my aunt like this (they’ve been married for over 30 years by the way):  he tossed her a ring box and said, “Maybe this will shut you up for awhile”.  I know it sounds terrible but if you knew him, you’d get it!  And she said yes but it’s still something they laugh about.

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