(Closed) exhausted to tears (long – sorry)

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

(((HUGS)))

I’m sorry ๐Ÿ™ It IS tough, and it sounds like you’re being really strong, and have been for a while.

Is there a chance that you can take a night off to relax and refocus on each other, remember why this is all worth it?

Post # 4
Member
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think you should take up poetry and short stories again.  I think more than anything you need something for you.  Something to let you forget about the financial troubles, just for a little while.  You will be ok – you seem to have a good plan in place and even though it is frustrating now, you will figure it out.  Scale back a bit more on the wedding if you can.  You need to do something for yourself though, so you have a release and can cope with the frustrations without keeping it bottled up.  It’s ok to be upset and cry when you need to.  Remember you have a wonderful supportive partner and that you two are together in this.  Use each other to get through this.  Best of luck to you ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 5
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Hang in there!  It will get better!  I just got my PhD….I owe the so much in student loans that I could have bought a home with the money I owe (not a down payment, I could’ve bought a whole house!!).  I have only found part-time work making only slightly more than I made as a grad student, with no benefits.  So I feel ya!

My advice…just roll with it!  Life is really how you look at it.  FI and I just take it one semester at a time: right now, we can afford our rent, we can eat, and we can save for the wedding.  We had to push our wedding back a year, but meh.  We live together and love each other, and that is what is important.  At the end of the night, I get to fall asleep next to Fiance – and i am happy with that!  

Just concentrate on all the good things in life right now – and the bad things seem less important!

Post # 6
Member
1963 posts
Buzzing bee

I am sorry that you are feeling so low.  Many things get me by when I am feeling discouraged by finances.  1. You have it so much better than most of this world. and 2. Your struggle will give you strength unparalleled. 

I encourage you not to be jealous of the wealth of a friend. You never know what they carry with them.  Best of luck and I hope you see the sun soon.

Post # 7
Member
503 posts
Busy bee

@Miss Wallaroo: Oh dear, this is one of those moments when the only thing to do is just cry! Just let it all out! I am in your same position, except currently in school. SO and I both working very hard to just to make ends meet and trying to juggle work and school and keep our bills paid somedays seems next to impossible. I have awful days when I just want to break down and toss my hands up in the air. Sometimes I get so angry that we can’t go on nice vacations or out to fancy dinners like some of my friends. But honestly, what helps me the most is when I remind myself I am loved, and I am lucky enough to be in a very loving caring relationship with a man who adores me. My SO and I find other fun, and inexpensive things to do. Game nights on the living room floor, movie night on the couch, and walking around downtown with coffee are all examples of how we try and have fun together without spending too much money.

I dated a guy for three years who was very wealthy. He did everything for me, and paid all of our bills. We went on nice vacations, and I never had to worry about a thing.  But honestly, I was miserable! I felt so alone and unhappy. It makes me appreciate my SO so much more now.

I would definitely reccomend writing. Maybe start a blog? If you aren’t comfortable with people seeing it you can always make it private, but use it as a journal. It is a really great way to gather your thoughts without completely losing it. I have one that I write in when I get upset. I really hope the best for you, and hope things get a little bit easier every day. Sometimes all you need is a good vent, and most of us have no problem listening.

Post # 9
Member
503 posts
Busy bee

@Miss Wallaroo: I’ve always felt like WB is like a secret sisterhood. I don’t know anyone on the boards very well, but for some reason I feel very compassion in being there for anyone who needs to just vent. Mostly because I have had rough moments, and needed comfort and advice, and I have always gotten such wonderfully supportive feedback. There are a lot of classy ladies on here :O)

Post # 10
Member
301 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Ohh.. <<hugs>>  I am so sorry that you’re having a rough time!  I totally feel you on the financial part.  I’m in grad school currently and just keep incurring debt…. it’s so stressful!!  There is a light at the end of the tunnel, there always is.  Just keep being strong like you’ve already been and you’ll get there.  Life is stressful and even more so when you’re planning a wedding and you see money going away faster than it’s coming in.  But it won’t be your reality forever. 

I agree that you should take up poetry/blogging or whatever outlet you need again.  It definitely helps to have something to go to when things get to the point of tears.  Don’t lose heart!! 

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