Post # 1
Member
271 posts
Helper bee
My ex fiancee and i are not really speaking as we’re not friends but we have no ill feelings. He wanted me back but I said no as he had some issues and he knew why. So we remained in contact as little as possible for legal financial reason and once that was done, I haven’t spoken to him since. His gf however knows he doesn’t love her. He told her straight up he still loved me and I’m the love of his life. He wrote me emails telling me he wants me back and he doesn’t want her (she was living with him as she’s young and had no where to go after her grandmother passed away) and she read them. Anytime something happened with him, she would call me and go on a rampage. I was sympathetic and when it happened the first couple of times, I talked to her, woman to woman, trying to help. After that, I just laughed it off. She was just annoying, calling me racial slur and trying to insult me and I never let it get to me.
Last year when she realized he didn’t want her, she stopped taking her birth control and got pregnant. He stayed for the kid. She just gave birth few weeks ago from what I understand. Last couple of times she called or texted me, it was after she found out he wanted to name the baby he and I chose when we thought about having a family and he tried to meet me as he missed me (I didn’t meet him btw). He apparently told her a lot about me because he told her I could not have kids. So that was her attack on me. I laughed it off.
Since she’s had the baby few weeks ago, she’s sent me 3 pictures of them. I do not have proof its her but its from an email address that has “lil fam” in the name and there is no one else in my life who would do that. This does hurt a lot as the only thing I’ve wanted was a family and I cannot have kids. I tried adoption but due to my health in the past, it was denied (cancer).
I have not replied to the messages and I even blocked it. She apparenly makes a new email and sends it each time. I thought about reaching out to him to ask him to put an end to it as I do not want to deal with her crazy crap. What would you do bees?
Post # 2
Member
10491 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
Beat her up in the parking lot. But that’s not mature and you would likely go to jail so disregard that piece of advice.
Im not sure if you have any recourse legally (legal bees?) and other than continuing to block her I don’t know what else to suggest. I imagine if you talk at all to your ex it will just make things worse. Eventually if you don’t respond I think she’ll get bored and quit.
Sorry bee, this really sucks.
Post # 3
Member
651 posts
Busy bee
I would get a new email. Had to once for similar reasons… ex kept trying to contact me. If he wasn’t showing up to my work or home…. or calling me… he was emailing me or making fake accounts/spoof phone numbers left and right. So yes you can block all day… but the best thing to do is just create a whole new email account and move all your accounts over to that email… and new phone number too (in my case). It is WAY easier than waiting on the next new phone number or email to come in… Because they will not KNOW either of those…
Post # 4
Member
271 posts
Helper bee
slomotion : That was my first thought! lol
I don’t know if talking to her would do any good. I thought about messaging back and telling her she looks hideous but that’s just immature and petty lol
Post # 5
Member
573 posts
Busy bee
Cut them both out of your life asap. Now more answering calls or woman-to-woman. Their relationship is none of your business. Delete all messages and block all contact.
Change your email address/phone number if need be or get the police involved if they’re harrassing you. Don’t answer any of their messages. Ignore, delete, block.
No one needs that shit.
Post # 6
Member
560 posts
Busy bee
This crap infuriates me… what is wrong with people?!?!? I think not talking to her or saying anything is your best route because any engagement at all will just egg her on. Definitely get a new email address, if you can. I’m sorry you’re going through this. What an awful, heartless person.
Post # 7
Member
610 posts
Busy bee
I was going to say block her phone, email, social media, all of it, but then you said she keeps making new emails, that’s straight up crazy. If possible I’d make yourself a new email address. Otherwise when you see her name, delete without reading as if it’s spam.
Post # 8
Member
132 posts
Blushing bee
Wowwww she sounds like a cruel little girl desperate for attention :\
If you have no need to have contact with your ex, just stay silent and keep blocking her every time she attempts to contact you. Don’t fuel the fire, responding will only give her a window to keep engaging you and trying to get under your skin. Eventually she’ll realize that all she’s doing is humiliating herself (or maybe she won’t, but either way, not your problem!).
But wow, seriously, I’m so sorry that you have to deal with this nutcase! Don’t let her get you down, stay classy 🙂
Post # 9
Member
10456 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
Block her on all social media and get a new email. Save everything she’s been sending you so you have it documented for the police in case she starts to escalate her behavior.
Do not respond to her. It’s best not to engage at all.
Post # 10
Member
271 posts
Helper bee
Unfortunaltey this email address ie one I’ve had for over a decade and tied to SO many things. She doens’t use her real name as email address, usually uses “Anony Mous” as first and last time. I did make a new email and have started moving things over to the new email, just taking forever and I still need to check the email.
I haven’t spoken to them in months and I never initiate contact so it’s just really annoying.
What I really want to do is tell him I’ll take him back to get him to dump her and then get rid of him but that’s just cruel and stupid, I know. It’s fun in my head though lol.
She even tried to talk smack about my current bf and family when she couldn’t get to me. Stupid girl.
Post # 11
Member
5 posts
Newbee
Get a restraining order against her. That should scare her enough to leave you alone.
Post # 12
Member
271 posts
Helper bee
Ashleyox29 : i did look into it but they said I had no proof it was her so it wouldn’t be granted. Plus I moved to a different state so we’re not even in same state anymore!
Post # 13
Member
902 posts
Busy bee
Wow. I think you already did too much in the past by talking to her.
I would just change my email and block her and the EX on everything. There is really no reason to be in contact with him anymore. Its really not your concern that he sees you as the love of his life or reasons why he is with her.
BLOCK them and wish them the best.
Post # 14
Member
1168 posts
Bumble bee
Agree with the restraining order. She’s harrassing you. Keep all of the calls in your log, keep all of the messages, document what’s said in the conversations with dates and times corresponding to your phone log. She’s nuts and I’m sorry you’re dealing with that!
Post # 15
Member
146 posts
Blushing bee
Don’t know if this is the best idea (prob not), but if I were in your shoes I’d prob tell my ex that if she didn’t stop contacting me I’d go to the cops. If he’s really still in love with you, he will probably try to stop her from distressing you.
Other than that, I agree with everyone who said block her on every medium.