(Closed) Ex’s trying to contact me before the wedding…?

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Hrm I usually stay in touch with a lot of my exes…in fact I’m inviting one’s parents to the wedding and another ex is actually invited.

I will say one ex is trying his darnest to contact me after finding out I was getting married, but I pretty much told him to eff off (obviously we aren’t in contact or friends lol)

Post # 4
Member
1026 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Honestly I don`t think thats that odd. If I knew my ex was getting married I would msg her. Not in a creepy wanting to get together way but just to congradulate her because she is still special in my heart.

Post # 6
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

I don’t have any exes, but I would find that weird. I’d message back, good to hear from you! I’m marrying a great guy with a big peener.

Post # 7
Member
1856 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I suspect the same thing will happen when we actually officially announce we’re engaged and when we get married – while I’m ‘friends’ with some exs on FB, and would totally think it normal if they congratulated me, etc, I do have one ex who I have removed from my life entirely. We have a handful of mutual friends and acquaintances who I’m not very interested in telling, because I don’t want him to decide it’s time once again to start harassing me. So I totally get where you’re coming from!

 

@hisgoosiegirl:  Best reply.

Post # 8
Member
102 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I try to stay good friends with most of my exes, so a lot of them will actually be invited to the wedding.  I still haven’t gone public with the news yet, so I’m not sure exactly what their reactions will be, but I don’t anticipate too much awkwardness.

Post # 9
Member
599 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I think it’s pretty normal… I mean you’re about to sever all chance of being with anyone else by getting married. It’s pretty normal to get nostalgic and have your mind wander back to the past.

I think its always good to keep perspective because over time it’s easy to only remember the good and not why you broke up or it didn’t work… so reminded yourself of the negatives isn’t always a bad thing.

In my case I am still “friends” with exes, in that we talk, but I wouldn’t class it as friends as such, it’s jus an occassional “how are you” kind of thing, I just want to protect the relationship that Fiance and I have…because that is always my #1 priority.

Post # 10
Member
1406 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

I am “friends” with my exes on FB but became friends while I was married the first time. The minute I changed my status to “single”, I got 3 messages from the exes.  All 3 are married By The Way…I pretty much ignored them. 

I didn’t update my status until recently but last year, one of the guys sent me another message “Are you still single?”  Him and his wife recently had a baby so not sure what the heck that message was about.  I know some people “reconnect” on FB 20 years later (my XH tried to do this with a girl he dated in HS) but really….20 years later???  I guess some people ARE still living in the past…

Post # 11
Member
158 posts
Blushing bee

Isn’t it funny how exe’s and other guys who liked you come up when you are taken? I’m not engaged, but I had this happen to me when I started announcing I was in a relationhip with my bf. 

All of a sudden, exe’s started talking to me on Facebook, asking questions. And also had some guys who went to my high school who I was then not good enough for, but now that I am older apparently am good enough for now, start messaging me.  

I personally brushed them all off, because they really aren’t the type of people I want to be around. 

My ex was very curious as to who this new guy was and where he was from. I just told him I was happy with my bf and left it at that. My ex is known to sort of ‘stalk’ me in a sense. He digs up information about me (whether true or not) from the gossip train. I come from a small town so there is always talk. And then makes assumptions about me based on what he hears :S Nice thing is, after telling him I am happy, he has left me alone! YAY 😀

I think the reason guys start coming at you when you announce an engagement is the idea of the forbidden fruit. They can’t have you now, so it makes you more intriguing to them. 

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