(Closed) Extra sad today & need to vent..

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

I was running a few weeks ago and I was thinking about how stressed I’ve been and I was listening to a particularly emotional song (Perth by Bon Iver) and just started bawling while I was crying because I realized that my grandmother who had passed away 10 years ago wouldn’t be present.  Shit, just made me cry again.  *sigh* The thing is, we should be trying to make an event (and bride) that they would be proud of, right?  That’s what I keep telling myself anyway.  *hug*

Post # 4
Member
9614 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

((HUGS))  I lost both my mom and my beloved grandmother many years ago and it’s still not easy. 

Post # 5
Member
496 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@soon2beMRSgq:  Sending you a big hug! 

My Mom is battling CHF, MS and Breast Cancer ATM and I am TERRIFIED that she won’t be well for our wedding or be around to help me raise my future babies. That alone makes me feel awful, so I can’t imagine how you are feeling.

I’m sure your Mom will be watching over you on your big day and that she would be very proud of you for being such a strong person!

Post # 6
Member
2 posts
Wannabee
  • Wedding: November 2013

I am sorry you are feeling sad. Perhaps a cute kitten photo will help?

Post # 7
Member
11284 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@soon2beMRSgq:  @WillyNilly:  maybe not in body, but i’m sure they will be there and they will be very proud.

Post # 8
Member
8044 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

You need to talk to someone you’re close to about this. I think that might really help you. I think it’s only natural to feel this way… weddings bring out a lot of emotion. Maybe try to incorporate touches of your mom into the wedding and it might feel like she is more present?

I’m not a huge promoter of things like counselling, but maybe talking to a professional about this might also help a bit? At the very least you could vent. My employer has a program that is included as part of our benefits that offers a program like that where we can see counsellors if need be.

Also… I know that it’s important to enjoy your wedding, but try to put less pressure on yourself – after all, it is only one day. You’re going to be married to the man you love. Before you know it, all this will be over.. keep that in mind.

Post # 10
Member
9614 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@mypinkshoes:   Love that thought!  I feel that way, too, that they’re smiling upon us.

Post # 12
Member
45627 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@soon2beMRSgq:  Weddings do surface all the emotions – both good and bad. It is only natural to be thinking of your Mom at this time.

Would she want you to be depressed and down at this time in your life? I am sure she would not. She would want you to enjoy every minute of the planning, the wedding, and most importantly the marriage.

In your mother’s honor, savor every moment. When you are choosing shoes- think of what your Mom’s reaction would be. Would she squeel with delight or would she wonder how you could walk on those heels?

Keep her in your heart but don’t let your heart ache. She wouldn’t want that for you.

Post # 13
Member
3583 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

^ Ya, if she’s anything like my mom, she will hate any pair I liked, it was like an inside joke.  I hope you find the fun in the process soon!  🙂

Post # 14
Member
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Aww I’m so sorry – my mom also doesn’t live in the same city as me and I feel so bad everytime I have to buy something and she’s not here…but maybe u cld find ways to include her? Do u have anything she wore on her wedding day? It sounds like u already have some of her nice things to wear, but u could also ask your priest (if u are using one) to say a prayer for her during the ceremony (we’re doing this for my FI’s mom who’s also unfort passed away), or if u have a celebrant maybe light a candle for her?

I’ve also heard ppl putting photos of their parents’ wedding or old photos of ppl passed away at their reception somewhere (like next to the cake). U cld also put her name on your wedding invitation, include a favorite poem of hers into your service, put some of her favorite flowers in your bouquet or as decorations, keep a place card w her name for her, and mention her in the toasts. In any case, she will def b there in spirit and so proud of u! 🙂 *hug*

Post # 15
Member
269 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

Oh, I wanted to also say: I’m puting my wedding bouquet at my MIL’s grave for her. Maybe u cld do that too, or put it somewhere meaningful for your mom!

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