Post # 1
Hello lovely bees! Today is the day that our RSVP’s are due and we only have a 70% response rate (as of 5:45 pm). Would it be appropriate for me to send a group reminder message via facebook to gently remind everyone to RSVP? Everyone would be on the “naughty” list, so it wouldn’t be broadcasting to people who have already RSVP’d that these people had not.
I have no qualms about sending individual facebook messages to these people to remind them, it just would take longer. The RSVP is online through our wedding website, so I could link to that page as well.
Also, I’m sure a lot of you are wondering why the heck I made my RSVP date so soon! It would take a ton of explaining, but suffice it to say that I’m in an insanely intense graduate school program and need as much time as possible to chip away at the remaining wedding tasks.
Thanks for your responses & advice!
Post # 3
Don’t send a group message. Either call them on the phone or email them individually. I’d give them some leeway too — having an RSVP deadline seven weeks out is mega-early.
Post # 4
Do it !!! I don’t think it’s rude at all I would be really greatfull actually I am such a forgetful person 🙂 good luck xxx
Post # 5
I see nothing wrong with that at all. I’m sure old fashioned etiquette would say otherwise but I think it’s fine!
Post # 6
Pick up the phone and call them? If you don’t have time for that, you could send an email and BCC everyone
Post # 7
I think a lot of people mistakenly see the RSVP date as the “mail-by” date. I would give it a day or two and see if anything rolls in. Also, I don’t think a group message would be appropriate because when someone replies- it’s sent to everyone and everyone sees it. Someone might reply with something going on in their life that they might not want everyone knowing.
Post # 8
I would definitely call/e-mail individually
Post # 9
Individually contacting is the way to go. Like PP mentioned, in a group message the response goes to everyone.
Post # 10
@castaway83: I hate group messages. Everytime someone replies I get a notification. So annoying. Just message them individually or call.
Post # 11
I tracked down all my rsvp’s a day early to save on headache. I don’t see anything wrong with it. but you could give them a couple of days and then call them if you have their numbers as well.
Post # 12
You’re choices are a little extreme. I don’t think it’s rude to do a group message, however, I personally wouldn’t do it. Others mention that you get a notification everytime someone responds, but you can opt out of group messages so I don’t think that’s really a problem. I would just copy paste your message over and over and send it individually or better yet call (as they will have to give you an answer on the spot if they pick up).
Give them a couple of days though. We had a flood of them 2 days after because people mailed them on the due date.
Post # 13
@castaway83: I would be incredibly offended to get a group facebook message.
Post # 14
I would wait at least a week if today was the due date. I’m sure you’ll get more trickling in. I would call everyone or at least email them individually. Facebook just seems inappropriate to me.
Post # 15
@castaway83: Unfortunately, this is the result when you try to force people oustide of what is socially acceptable. People are probably thinking your event is still quite far away (in RSVP land) and it’s not on their radar.
That being said, you should never point out other people’s faux pas’ in a group situation. Follow up with each person individually.
Post # 16
I got a group message a week before the RSVP date, and then 1 day before the RSVP date from someone for not responding. I was really annoyed. I hadn’t forgotten the RSVP, and got a notification whenever someone sent a message. On top of it all, I wasn’t even late in sending the RSVP back. They got my RSVP card the day before the due date (but after sending the FB message).
Needless to say it was annoying. Even though you’re not doing it before the deadline, just reach out to people individually.