(Closed) Fairweather Friends?

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
1104 posts
Bumble bee

I don’t think she really wants to be your friend, unfortunately. It can be hard to realise especially if you have known each other for a long time, but that’s not a good enough reason to hold onto a friendship if you have different life styles/values/beliefs/etc. I would let the friendship go.

Her behaviour about her b’day reminds me of a friend I had all through high school. We went to the same university so kept hanging out a fair bit, although not as often as before. Her birthday was coming up and I tried calling/texting multiple times in the weeks beforehand saying things like “I’d love to take you out for a birthday drink, let me know what you’re up to” and I never heard back. A week or so after her birthday I ran into her on campus and said I’d been trying to call her, how was her birthday, etc. She said “oh I didn’t want to do anything for my birthday. But if you call me now I’ll pick up the phone.” I decided at that moment she didn’t really want my friendship and I never contacted her again. Luckily I also never ran into her on campus again either!

I like to spend my time and energy on people who a) appreciate it and b) do the same for me. This girl doesn’t seem to be doing either so I think you’d be better off being a good friend to people who really deserve it 🙂

Post # 4
Hostess
18643 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

I honestly would stop talking to her.  It doesn’t sound like you get any positive things out of the relationship anymore, and it is just causing you distress.  If she doesn’t want to spend time with you or talk to you, it’s her loss.

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