(Closed) Fall out from Domestic Violence.

posted 4 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 2
Member
46 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: March 2016

It takes a long time, but you know in your heart that not being in an abusive relationship is what’s best for you. When I sought councelling after my ex I met other women who had been in their abusive relationships for 20+ years, it’s no way to live. The pain may always be there but it’ll get easier, I promise, and it’ll make you stronger every single day you recognise that you did something incedibly difficult in getting out of it. Hugs for you x

Post # 4
Member
11523 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2014

Thank you so much for sharing your story.  I imagine it can’t be easy to write that out for strangers on the internet.  I’m lucky enough to have never been in such a relationship.  Sometimes it’s easy to forget that getting out is only part 1 – the trauma lasts and getting yourself healthy is the real battle.

I’m glad to hear you’re doing better and your Darling Husband is supporting you in every way he can.

Post # 5
Member
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2016

I was emotionally abused – not to the extent you experienced (or the degree). But it changes you. Time and healing and work (as in working through it) is the only thing that is working for me. But I still struggle. I send you my love and prayers – no one should have to go through that. 

Post # 6
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

Thank you for sharing.  I am in a similar position.  I suffer from PTSD because of a previous relationship I stayed in for five years.  It’s hard and I’m not sure the damage will ever be completely undone.  But therapy is a great first step to emotional freedom.

Post # 7
Member
264 posts
Helper bee

Mrs.MilitaryBee:  I just want to hug you after reading this. 🙁 Thanks for sharing your story – we always see the romanticized version of “perfect” love but there is a dark side too, that we should all be aware of. Your story could help someone realize that it’s alright not to be okay after suffering something traumatic, or help someone realize that it’s time to leave. Thanks for putting this out there.

Post # 8
Member
3236 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Thank you for sharing this. It gave me chills down my spine to read, but I am glad that I did in case I ever need to be there for someone going through what you are doing.

Post # 9
Member
234 posts
Helper bee

I’m so glad you’re in therapy. I have something called “panic wakeups” that started after the first episode of abuse with my ex, and continue to this day (7 years later.) I wake up at night thinking I’m dying. My counsellor says it may be because since those abusive times, part of my brain is always alert, since that’s how I protected myself when living with my ex. We’re trying to work through how to stop this since I’m now living with a gentle and non-abusive man. So far I’ve tried telling myself “I am completely safe. (SO) would never harm me. It’s safe to completely relax and sleep through the night.” It’s lessened the amount of times I’ve woken up, but it still happens. However I just started doing this so maybe it will get better and better!

Best of luck with your therapy, you went through so much and I’m glad you’re working with someone to recover from your trauma!

  • This reply was modified 4 years, 3 months ago by  bluephoenix.

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