(Closed) Family Drama

posted 6 years ago in Family
  • poll: Do I cut my future brother in law out of my life?
    Yes : (3 votes)
    30 %
    No : (4 votes)
    40 %
    give him another chance : (3 votes)
    30 %
  • Post # 3
    7683 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I’m sorry you’ve got to put up with this, but this is your fiance’s decision, not yours.

    Post # 4
    8882 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper

    I’m sorry to hear you’re going through all this drama. You have every right to feel the way you do. But unfortunately he IS your FI’s brother, you can’t really cut him out unless your Fiance does. It’s very hard to cut family out of someone’s life. 

    What does your Fiance think about his behaviour? It may be time to have a serious talk with him and get him to step in.

    Post # 5
    427 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @margaritarow:  I could have written this about my SO’s sister. It is even harder with her because she will act like SO’s best friend in the world and then be a raving bitch to me. Honestly, it has been a long road even getting him to see her in a bad light and what she is doing to me, but now he recognises who she is and that has really taken her power away. I don’t think she will ever be fully out of our lives but her input is definitely limited. I agree though, this has to be 100% your FI’s decision. Have a chat with him about it and what you see as looking out for your Fiance. See if he agrees? 🙂 Good luck, these family issues suck!

    Post # 6
    1238 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    I agree with the previous post.  It sucks and it is ridiculous that he acts like that, but unless your FH makes this decision I think you need to live with him being around even if you attempt to distance yourself a bit. And make sure FH fully wants to otherwise he might begin to resent you for taking away his relationship with his brother. 

    Post # 7
    3415 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Lodge

    Agree with PP. You can talk to your Fiance and limit how much interaction you have with Future Brother-In-Law. But unfortunately you can’t fully get rid of him unless Fiance is willing. I deal with similar issues (although not as drastic) as you do but with my Future Father-In-Law and as of yesterday I have a feeling Future Sister-In-Law whom I never met until yesterday (after 3 years with my Fiance. He says there is a reason he never wanted me to meet her.) Good luck and I hope for the best for you.

    Post # 8
    68 posts
    Worker bee

    Sounds like my brother and if my SO wanted to cut my brother out of his life, then it would be a deal breaker. Family is family. 


    Post # 9
    433 posts
    Helper bee


    That sucks, he sounds like a real jerk.  If you’re getting married though he will be your family.  You can’t ask your FH to cut his brother out of his life.  If he wanted to do that he would do it on his own.  Unfortunately, when you get married you don’t just get the love of your life, you also get their family.  You better decide now if that is something you can handle for the rest of your life.

    The topic ‘Family Drama’ is closed to new replies.

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