(Closed) family drama: my vent and my thoughts during Christmastime

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
7975 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

It’s tough, isn’t it, when our (unintentional) expectations aren’t met. I’m sorry your parents aren’t being more supportive – do you have friends/bridesmaids/future in-laws you can turn to for support instead?

It sounds like, despite it being hard, you’re keeping your focus on what is really most important to you (your union in God) and that’s a huge thing – perspective can help a lot! And you’re right – your wedding will be beautiful and it will be awesome and it will be fun, no matter what!

Post # 4
6015 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

It hurts even more when your family are the one’s letting you  down and not being a true family, and supporting each other.   I’m glad your staying focused on the bigger picture, the Lord.  I know it’s hard, but your right the most important thing is the life you are going to build with your Fiance.  Hang in there!

Post # 5
714 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

@jess:  I’m sorry your parents are being so difficult and hurtful.  Sometimes, no matter how hard we try, its difficult to just accept people for who they are instead of wishing they were something else. 

I’m going to go out on a limb here and guess that your parents have always been difficult.  Did you say they were threatening not to come to the wedding if you invite some of your siblings – as in, some of their other children?  Insulting your dress?  Good grief. 

I think you should decide now to stop letting them bully you and stop trying to bend over backwards to please them.  If they threaten not to come because you want to invite your brothers and sisters, calmly tell them that you’re very sorry to hear it and that they will be missed.  Offer to include them but if they refuse, try not to be hurt.  They are who they are.  And look around – are there other people who can share this time with you joyfully?  Friends or other family?  Take what is available to you and keep your faith and keep strong.

Good luck, Jess. 

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