(Closed) FAMILY DRAMA OVER GUEST LIST

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@aurelia: I don’t blame you.  If your grandmother wants her friends and family to attend the wedding, she should offer to pay for them.  
If not, she shouldn’t give you a hard time about your list.

Post # 5
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

Ugh…my mom is the nightmare one in this situation.  Exact same situation but it’s my mom.  I feel for you and I am so sorry!! It’s so hard to respect a person who is acting like a bratty teenager.  

Post # 6
Member
536 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

@aurelia: Do you think your family thinks that your parents are covering these costs?  If they knew that only you and your Fiance are paying for it, I think they would understand.

I’ve had about 2 people call my mother about not getting a STD.  One person we didn’t have their address and another we completely forgot about.  I’m in a different sitauation because my parents are paying for the reception.

Post # 7
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

*them acting like brats and not us of course.  And I respect you for cutting them out.  I wish I had enough support to do it!

Post # 11
Member
200 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

haha, I feel your pain. My grandma called a told me, not asked, that I needed to invite one of her friends I hardly know. I told her ok only because I’ve met this friend more than once. She then said she only wanted family at her table and not to put the friend at her table. What? She won’t really know anyone but my mom and I am not doing that to her. 

 

Stay strong in your decision because, after all, it is an extra $50 for each one you give in to, and a loss of someone you really wanted there. 

Post # 12
Member
3866 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@aurelia: heheheheh, that’s something I would’ve done!  Were you cold and wrong? Nope.  You’re paying, it’s your and your FI’s wedding, so they were in the wrong.  

So sorry you had to deal with rotten behavior!  (And people think it’s only kids who are bullies!)

Fortunately, my mom only reminded me of people I would’ve invited regardless, had I remembered.  We’re having a buffet-style meal, so people can sit wherever they want with whoever they want.  So far, my FI’s mom has stayed out of the inviting and wedding planning, which is good, because I’d hate to make enemies with her by telling her to butt out.  Considering she’s still not the warmest person towards me, I’m pretty sure that isn’t gonna happen. 😀  (There are days I jump for joy because of that, too! LOL!)

Post # 13
Member
50 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

@auriliea: I had this same issue with my grandmother. She wanted to invite “family friends” that I’ve met once or twice my entire life. I can only afford 130 people at our wedding and my fiance and I are financing the entire wedding. She REALLY wanted them to come, so we came to a compromise: They are invited, but she has to foot the bill for them. So, we are having 132 people at the wedding. I’m paying for 130 of them, and she’s paying for 2 of them. 

Post # 14
Member
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I’m sorry your family was ganging up on you about this issue.  I don’t know that there is a perfect way to handle the situation.  I think you did the best you could and ensuring your sanity is the most important thing.

((hugs))

I am not opposed to inviting some but not all.  If there are particular relatives who you are close to and havent participated in ganging up on you, i say do it – invite only the ones you want.

Post # 15
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@aurelia: I agree with everyone else and you! It’s your day, your dollar, you make the decision! I would have to say IF you think she will ruin your day in any way by taking the attention away…don’t invite her.  It’s not cold.  This day should be about you and your fiance and your love for one another…not someone who is throwing a fit b/c they didn’t get their way.  Look…Fergie wasn’t invited to the Royal wedding for the same reason…so I think it’s completely understandable.  I have decided to make my bridal party guards to prevent my mother from coming near me IF she is being a monster that day:).  I want it to be about love…not out of frustration.  It’s becoming a family with you and your fiance starting a new family all on your own…

I’m proud of you! Stay strong:)

Post # 16
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2011 - Blossom Heath

I don’t think that you are wrong at all for.

My mom keeps trying to get me to invite old friends of the family that I haven’t seen since before I graduated from high school and I have been out of college for 5 years. Sometimes you have to do things that give you peace of mind.

The topic ‘FAMILY DRAMA OVER GUEST LIST’ is closed to new replies.

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