(Closed) Family Drama Whether to Invite or Not to Invite

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
1326 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011 - Tre Bella, Mesa, AZ

It sounds like you really don’t want to invite them. I would explain to anyone who says you “should” invite certain people that you’re on a budget and you don’t feel close to certain family members. Don’t invite them if YOU don’t want to. Honestly, I’m not inviting about 15 aunts/uncles/cousins + my grandfather b/c they have always been awful to my family, and they are a package deal (grandfather is being taken care of by one of the families). When you are paying for the wedding yourself, a few seats can save hundreds of dollars.

Post # 4
Member
7173 posts
Busy Beekeeper

Does the rest of the family see the one aunt/cousin?  I’m assuming they do, or this wouldn’t even be an issue.  

I’m inclined to say invite them – because to not, would be making such a strong statement.  How does your mom/dad feel about it (whomever sister she is)?

Post # 6
Member
194 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2011

personally, I wouldn’t invite them. you’re footing the bill. i wouldn’t want rude people (family or not) at my wedding. if other family members seem to think you should invite those rude ones, tell them to foot the bill for them to come. sorry if i come off as b*tchy but in planning my own wedding, people have definitely pushed my buttons and i’m sick of being the nice guy haha. put your foot down girl! 🙂

Post # 7
Member
1920 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I wouldn’t invite. I think its your wedding and you get to choose who you invite and you really should only invite people who love and support you and it sounds to me like your aunt doesn’t. You shouldn’t feel obligated to invite anyone just because they are family.

Post # 8
Member
252 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2011

No joke- I could have wrote your entire post (to a T!). I did not invite the offending family members. My day not theirs.  It’ super frustrating having a family that cannot get a long with everyone, but in the end, it’s not worth the awkwardness on your wedding day (IMO).. hope you figure out what works for you, girlie!

Post # 9
Member
1269 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I wouldn’t invite them, MAYBE if it was just a little snarkiness and you think they’ll actually be pleasant to have on the day but if it looks like this behaviour is likely to continue then leave them out.

I’m currently trying to figure out how to not invite someone myself, including how to keep other family member from spilling the date ( wouldn’t put it past him to drive 1600 miles to get back at me).

Best of luck!

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